Roses are red Violets are red Oh sh*t the gardens on fire

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What is Santa's favorite color? Blue

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Joe Paterno walks into a police station.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the guy fly? Because he steped on a landmine

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why doesn't Squidward wear pants? Because he's a pervert

thumb_up thumb_down +4

If the blue man lives in the blue house, the red man lives in the red house and the green man lives in the green house, where does the orange man live? In the orange house.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A momma cow was grazing in the meadow with her three calves when the first one asked, "Mom, how did I get the name Rose? "Well when you were born, a rose pedal came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The second calf asked, "How did I get the name Daisy?" "Well when you were born, a daisy came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The third calf mumbled, "LKJLSKJFSLKJLKSJDF" incoherently, and the Mom responded, "Shut up, Cinderblock."

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Q: What did the Big Bad Wolf say to Little Red Riding Hood? A: Nothing, wolfs are mentally nor physically capable of talking

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the black man say to the white man? Hi im phill

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Q: What do you do when you meet someone new? A: You don`t know and expect me to do so? Get a life!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's worse than losing $100 at the racetrack? Losing at Russian Roulette

thumb_up thumb_down +4

New Name for Jersey Shore: American Whorer Story

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the orphan wish for Christmas during world war II? Parents What did he get? Bombed.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

It smells like triangles in here.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple Plenty of things

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Every time im sad, I think of a T-Rex trying to put on a hat.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call a horse with no legs? Useless.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

whats worse than getting no gifts for christmas? getting hit by a bus for christmas

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How do giant spiders like to spend their weekends? Eating Orphans.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q: What did the boy say to his mum when he saw a Lion A: Hey mum that's a Lion

thumb_up thumb_down +2

I have a joke. Okay, tell me. Just kidding

thumb_up thumb_down +2

"I can sell this watch for $500 dollars on the black market!" Well, you could sell your liver for $500 dollars on the black market too.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why is it pointless to brutally kill and dismember a Japanese man? You'd be satisfying his sexual fetish.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? Nothing, he also had no parents.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops