Gingers.

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How do you stop a train? You don't, unless your the conductor in which case you would hit the brake.

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Why are black people ghetto? Because they are black.

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So a dog walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "Quickly, someone give me the number for animal control."

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Q.whats the difference between a women's argument and a knife A. a knife has a point

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My mother forgot to make me a sandwich today.

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like this joke for a free ipod nano or a dead baby ?

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What's worse then your mouse running away? Getting hit by a plane

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Butt poop.

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A girl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty, He said 'No'. She asked him if he would want to be with her forever. He said 'no'. She then asked him if she were to leave would he cry, Once again, he replied 'no'. She had heard enough. As she walked away, tears streaming down her face the boy grabbed her arm and said.. 'Asking emotionally charged hypothetical questions that are completely irrelevant to the prior conversation is known as fishing for compliments. Except, your tears seem to reflect a more serious inner emotional neediness. I suggest you seek a psychologist.'

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What did johnny say when he fell down the stairs? Nothing he snapped his neck

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How did you know it was bedtime at Michael Jackson's house? When his clock's big hand met the little hand, usually at 10 or 11, though sometimes later if he had a concert that night.

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An astronaut and a cosmonaut are sitting in a bar, discussing who was better. The cosmonaut says, "We Russians were the first people in space!" The astronaut says, "That may be true, but we were the first to land on the moon my friend." The cosmonaut turns back to the astronaut and says, "Yes, but we shall be then first to ever land on the Sun!" So, the astronaut skeptically asks, "And how do you intend to do that?" The cosmonaut replies, "Simple.......we will go at night." Thank you to David Cross

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A guy walked up to me and said "I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam, I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam." I promptly informed the authorities. The man was transported to a mental institution and I later learned that he swallowed his own tongue and died. Nobody attended his funeral service.

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A man walks into a bar. The man says,"ouch, how could I have not seen the bar."

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why was it funny that the boy got a razor for christmas because he had leukemia

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whats the same about a spider and a grape? they both have eight legs, except for the grape.

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Why did Billy go into the white van? Because his parents came to pick him up from school.

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A lobster walks up to an octopus. What does he say? Nothing. Lobsters cannot talk.

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Racism is like black people... It should not exists...

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What starts with "m" and rhymes with monkey? Platypus

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A man accidentally forgets his daughter at a Sizzler

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Whats worse than 12 babys stapled to a tree? 1 baby stapled to 12 trees!

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Mitt Romney penis

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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