How do you fit four gays on a barstool? You turn it upside down

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Little old lady. Little old lady who? Little old lady who got hit by a bus.

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What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

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a man i knew who was a real jerk was about to drive home drunk. i was trying to stop him, but then he punched me in the face. i let him through. he died that night. i texted him all the way

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When a suicide-bomber went to heaven what did Allah give him apart from 72 virgins? 72 mothers in law.

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What did the heart surgeon say to the brain surgeon? We are both surgeons

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did u hear the one about helen keler neather did she

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There is a man who is half black half Jewish. He walking up a hill really fast. What happens to him? Answer: The Jewish side of his body will fall off and the black side will walk away.

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What do you say to a black man on the street? Hello.

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I really did not understand the chapter. Is there anyway I can meet with you at a later time to discuss what I did wrong?

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Hey, did you hear about the guy who got his left arm and left leg cut off? Yeah, it was pretty brutal. His right arm and right leg got cut off, too.

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My mother-in-law fell down a stairway. I turned to my wife and said “Call an ambulance!!”

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you ever hear the joke about the rabbi, the pope and an elephant? No? well its a good one...

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What did Madeline McCann get for Christmas? Nothing she's dead.

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what did the shark do when he died.....

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whats more annoying than being raped by a giant scorpian? finding out that half the anti-jokes are terrible

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Are you from Jamaica? 'Cause you're making me crazy! Are you from Haiti? I'm really sorry about all the disaster that's been happening there.

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why did the chicken cross the road because he wanted AIDS

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Reading books

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I'm a fork. Fork you!!

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he was peckish.

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Why did the cow cross the road? He was in the moooooooood.

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Q:What do you call a bird with wings? A:A bird -Ryan Vallee

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If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests? A question and answering session of information used to test knowledge of a specific idea or person.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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