what do you call a mentally and physically obese man? nothing until you know or obtain his name

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So a man walks into a bar, He says, "Hey bartender! Can I have some beer?" The bartender says, "Sure!" and hands the man a Bud Light. The man drinks the Bud Light and leaves afterward.

How did Darth Vader make the little black boy's day? "I am your father"*heavy breath, heavy breath*

What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable? The wheelchair.

A boy has a penis, a girl has a vagina.

KNOCK KNOCK! Who's there? KNOCK KNOCK! Umm... Who's there? KNOCK KNOCK! OMG I SWEAR TO GOD WHO THE HECK IS THERE?!?!? KNOCK KNOCK! *opens door* Oh.... It was a woodpecker...

How do you hold someone in suspense?

What's the difference between a whore and a blonde? There is not enough information to answer this question.

What rhymes with bigger and can jump really high? Tigger

you lose.

What would Hitler say if you give him a sandwich? Thankyou!

Why did Dolley Madison take the painting of George Washington out of the White House in 1814. It was on fire. By, Luke Atkins

A man walks into a bar... "Ouch"

If you have 12 apples and 7 oranges in one hand, and 9 apples and 10 oranges in one hand, what do you have? Very large hands.

Where do you find a dog? At a pet store.

How do you make a homeless person cry? cut an onion in front of him.

What is the difference between a rat and an italian? nothing.

How do you stop a baby from drowning? Take your foot of his head

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What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple whilst you're in a bar after finding out you have cancer when you visited your families grave? Having a refrigerator thrown at you by an aids infected monkey with no arms or legs.

"what happened to the man that was walking along the cliff" he was found the next day dead with a seagull on his head.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

Ronan Parke, making Justin Bieber look straight since 2009

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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