What's blue and orange at the bottom of a swimming pool? A dead baby, why's it there? I popped the arm bands.

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http://anti-joke.com/anti-joke/popular/a-paper-cut-is-a-trees-last-revenge

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Roses are red, Violets are red, I'm bleeding, Shit.

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WNBA

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Ding-Dong.............no knock-knocking required

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Poop swing

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What's the best part of having sex with a twelve year old? Watching them cry when they prosecute against you.

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Why are all Asians smart? Not all of them are, Asians are stereotypically smart because their parents most likely grew up in an under-developed country and want their children to be successful because they don't want their children to experience what they did.

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Why was Sally crying? Because she had a frog stapled to her face.

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why did the puppy poop? he had too

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm gonna f*ck you with a rake.

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What do you get if you cross a Kangaroo and a Sheep? They are too entirely different species and cannot be crossbred.

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What do fat kids and whales have in common? Ruth burden

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Why does 1 + 1 = 2? ....seriously P

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A horse walks into a bar, and a man says "Hey, why the long face?" The horse calmly turns to him and replies, "Because I'm a horse you drunk moron."

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Wow did you see stevie wonder's new house. neither has he

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What does the young boy say to the gay man Hello Jacob, because he was raised to respect and treat gays equally

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What does the alien say to the man? Nothing, because it is highly unlikely that an alien would ever land on Earth, and even more unlikely that they would speak the same language of us. On top of that, aliens would not know anything about our species, and would probably hide from us due to being frightened and eventually flee back to their home planet where we would never see them again because our techonology is not advanced enough and the chances that we would find their planet which is somewhere among the billions of planets in the universe, are slim.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead all walk into a bar. Because, often, friends go out together in social situations.

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If she is under the age of 18 years old and is identified by your state as a minor, shes too young for you bro.

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What's the difference between a cat and a banana? Bananas don't scream as much when you peel them.

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What looks like a chair but isn't? A picture of a chair.

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A man rode into town on Friday and stayed a while and then left on Friday how did he manage this?

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what's worse than getting a paper cut? Hiroshima

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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