Why would you call a child douche bag? Cause they're sterile

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What is black and blue and really is not in the mood for sex? The new girl at the women's shelter.

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervour father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happyness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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Where do you go when your friends called you spoiled? Africa.

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leon harney ya pikey

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What's worse than finding a pickle in a jar? Finding Snooki in a jar.

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What did the guy say to the blonde? "You're a blonde."

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when life throws you lemons your an idiot because it wont

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Once there was an ugly barnacle. He was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

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baskets

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Why did the bones cross the road? They didn't, the dogs ate them.

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What does Chuck Noris have under his beard? A chin

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what is red and lies in all four corners of the room? a baby that was playing with a chainsaw.

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I look back at all those hours I wasted playing those stupid video games, but then I'm reminded of all those people I brutally killed.

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Why did the boy die? He got shot in the face repeatedly.

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What do you call a man man with no arms and no legs floating in the ocean? Bob(he is bobbing in the water)

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Romeny or Obama? Obamney

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. It was hanging on a clothes line he didn't see.

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- Knock knock. - Who's there? - I am. - I am who? - You are Steve. - Indeed.

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Q: Who's afraid of the big bad wolf? A: A couple of pigs with questionable carpenter's skills, and maybe Red Riding Hood. Grandma wasn't so lucky.

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How do you kill a blonde? Shoot her in the head.

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Can Helen Keller keep a secret? No, she didn't hear it in the first place

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People Order Our Patties

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Brooklyn Nets or New Jersey Nets? Theres a difference

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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