If a tree falls on a woman and there's no one around to hear her scream why did a tree fall in the kitchen?

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A man spots Bill Murray at a restaurant in Los Angeles. He proceeds to tell his friends the story, who in turn believe him, as the story is plausible.

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Why does Michael J. Fox make the best milkshakes? He uses only the finest ingredients.

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What is brown red and white? I don't know, that's why I asked you

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So many dudes win with your mom who even knows if i'm your father!!

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Three men are walking on a beach when they find a lamp. They rub it, and a genie comes out. It tells them that they each get one wish, and to choose wisely. They each decide to discuss what to wish for with their wives. Their wives take them to a local hospital, where they receive treatment for hallucinations.

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What's better than being in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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I told you it would happen

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Fine, just remember that I want to help you, but you cannot ask me for help, and then throw a shitstorm of accusations at me, I have never worked for the feds and never will, I know nothing about their code of operations nor... Anything really. Let me give you an advice, I know that at least two people you trusted deeply betrayed you, but if you are not going to trust anyone again, then leave point zero while you still can do so alive. And no babe, this is not a threat, its advice.

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A cat jumped out of a tree. It died.

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Moderately entertaining story, friend.

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No.

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Why did the dog bite justin beiber? Why not?

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How much booze did the homeless man drink? All of it. He is severely depressed.

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How do u kill a mocking bird ? Stab it

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What do you say to a black man on the street? Hello.

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what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas?

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How many light bulbs does it take to screw a blonde? She said she can do 3

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Why is a blonde girl crying in the bathroom? Because she has been bullied and someone broke her nose.

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Knock, Knock Who's There A dyslexic kid with aides

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Why did Lebron go to Miami? Because Chuck Norris told him to.

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How do you know a French guy has been in your back yard? Your thrash cans are empty and your dog's pregnant

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When is your birthday? November 13 what year? every year

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Knock Knock Who's there? Your mum, I've just raped her

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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