Why did the

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A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. His family is struggling financially and his children are severely malnourished. If he wasn't an alcoholic, he could afford healthcare for his family and move into a better neighborhood. But he's not, so they will die a long, painful death.

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why did the boy have to go to the dentist he was hit by a brick

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A man walks into a bar, and says "ow."

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Why was the girl crying? Because she was brutally raped

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What did the man say to the waiter when he was about to tip him? I'm not gay, but $20 is $20.

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The Detroit Lions

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Yo momma's so fat she is now a sponsor for Jenny Craig after joining the program and loosing almost a 100 pounds. So I suppose she isn't too fat anymore.

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whats worse than being cold? having a pine cone shoved up your ass.

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Q: What did the dog say to the cat? A: animals don't talk

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Why are Asians good at math? Because coincidentally many are interested in it and study a lot.

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kknocckkck knockckkckccck hue's theeeair? TTThhe pOOOliCCee. fffor whaaa? yyouu rr arreesstedd forrr drrunkkkc dddrivvinnng! Puuut urerre frreaakkki'n hannnddss uppp!

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What's mean to black people? The economy. But, I forgot to mention that it's not nice to whites, hispanics, asians or anyone else.

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kkk

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Whats 9 + 10? 19.

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What happened to the boy who spilled his fruit punch on the president? He was offered a new one compliments of Obama himself.

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whats helen kellers favorite activity fingering herself

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What's worse than getting stabbed Getting stabbed two times

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Why did the handicap man scream for help? Because he fell out of his wheel chair

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knock knock. Who's there? The delivery man.

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A man with Tourette's syndrome walks into a bar. Because of his disease, he shouts unexpected profanities across the room, and everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the humiliation anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom, pulls out a gun, and points it at his head. His wife walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and he notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to make. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. Shocked and afraid, he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentenced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man still suffers from Tourette's and cannot control his ticks and rots in jail. He continues to scream random obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

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A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. It started raining and an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful time. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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what do you call an astrounaut in space? an astrounaut you racist bastard

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have a dick just for you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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