Once upon a time, I was a Muslim.

Roses are 3:18 Violets are 3:18 I Just figured out a pattern. And saved peoples lives with the help of Keifer Sutherland.

Roses are red Violets are tits I like tits Tits

What do you call a Muslim in control of a plane? A pilot

Why did the little boy have a gun pointed at his head? Because he hated his life and wanted to kill himself.

Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. Where's my tractor?

What did the fish say when it hit a wall? Nothing. Fish cannot talk.

Why do people poke people on facebook? Because they have no friends and will die alone

What does the alien say to the man? Nothing, because it is highly unlikely that an alien would ever land on Earth, and even more unlikely that they would speak the same language of us. On top of that, aliens would not know anything about our species, and would probably hide from us due to being frightened and eventually flee back to their home planet where we would never see them again because our techonology is not advanced enough and the chances that we would find their planet which is somewhere among the billions of planets in the universe, are slim.

Samraj.

What number is funnier than 23? 24.

Why do women have boobs? So they can feed their newborn children without paying for expensive formula

If 2 trains are going 60 mph, their going in opposite directions towards each other, they are slowing down 1 mile per hour per 10 miles and they are 100 miles away, would you rather have Coke or Pepsi?

What is the difference between a shark and a human? A shark is a type of fish with a full cartilaginous skeleton and a highly streamlined body and a human is the only living species in the Homo genus.

Why did the mailman cross the road? To deliver mail

Whats brown and sticky? A stick

Me: Why are red onions actually purple..? Dad: I don't know Sister: *sarcastic* Well, Why is it rainy in London? Me: ....Because that's the weather pattern.

What's funnier than the world ending? Ray Charles and Stevie Wonder in a staring contest.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I'll order The Special, what's wrong with you?

Your mom is soooo fat..... She'll most likely suffer a heart attack

- kellen says to bill "your a fruit cake" - bill say to raj "your a gypsy" - raj says to kellen "you have gingevitis" R.I.P kellen 2012

what's worse than getting a paper cut? Hiroshima

knock knock who's there Scott, Scott who, Scott Rollheiser stole my joke and posted it here.

Why did little Jimmy cry when his Rolls Royce got destroyed? Because his parents were in it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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