A man walks into a bar. He is rushed to the hospital due to a large aneurysm that has burst in his brain because he walked into the bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Whats faster that a Mexican with your TV? A speeding bullet.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

whats worse than getting in a car crash Heroshema

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What happened to the boy who spilled his fruit punch on the president? He was offered a new one compliments of Obama himself.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why doesn't Micheal Jackson do a music video with Usher? Because he is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What do you call Bilbo Baggins when you use him for pleasure? Dildo Baggins

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What's sad about four black people going over in a cliff in Cadillac? It was my Cadillac.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What do you call 55,000 clowns exiting a small car? Fiction.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What is the difference between a motorcycle and a football? 42, because ice cream has no bones.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What is the science of classifying living things? Racism...

thumb_up thumb_down -24

There are two types of people in this world: Those who can finish lists. and

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Whats green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

So a duck walks into a drugstore and asks the clerk for lip balm. The clerk asks, "How will you be paying for that?" to which the duck replies, "Cash."

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why can't the boy ride his bike to school? It has no wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Yo mamma so fat, she is going on a diet and is very sensitive about her weight.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

John Travolta goes to the supermarket..

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What does Harry Potter love? Magic

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What's black & sits at the top of the staircase? A quadriplegic after a house fire.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his monthly car bill is too freaking high and can't afford to take car to work, where all of his co- workers are waiting to tease him!

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Your mama is so ugly. But she is still a respected member of the community

thumb_up thumb_down -24

As friend of mine recently told me that he knew my deepest darkest secret. When I asked him what it was, he said that I was too emotionally unstable, and that I would never be ready to settle down. I killed him.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

your mom is so fat, shes not skinny

thumb_up thumb_down -26

what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? where's my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops