Knock Knock. Who's there? Not the Twin Towers.

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Why is it impossible to travel faster than the speed of light? Because it travels pretty darn fast.

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How do you cripple a fireman? You push him down the stairs.

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you wanna hear a funny joke? so do I

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Getting up, the 2nd hardest thing in the morning.

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Knock knock What?

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A man walked on the street where he saw an other man. The two men said: "Hi!" to each other and walked together down the road. Then one of the men got ran over by a car. The other man said: "ROFL".

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what do you call a blonde that spends fifteen thousand dollars at a bar? an alchoholic.

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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Why did the dog bite justin beiber? Why not?

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Roses are red Violets are blue I like to slap hookers

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John - hey do you have tickets to see Oasis? Sam - No I bought green day tickets intead. John rolls his eyes at sam very dissapointedly then proceeds to go home. The next day Sam phones John excitedly telling him he traded his Green day tickets for Oasis tickets, a smile appears on Johns and Sams faces, not that they can see each other, they both then put the phone down. An African died. Green Day are a bad band.

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A man walks into a bar.....he then slips on an ice-cube and suffers massive trauma due to the fall. The owner is sued by the mans family and subsequently loses his business. He can no longer provide for his family. His wife is two weeks away from giving birth to their third child.

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How many spiders dose it take to cover a wall? Four, if they are 7 feet tall

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How do you keep black people from hanging around in your front yard? Hang them in the back..

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You

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Whats plastic and little boys turn it on? A game cube, and Michael Jackson. Well maybe not anymore since hes dead...

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What did the boy say to the ghost wearing a banana outfit? Holy crap! A ghost!

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Why did the boy throw the clock out the window? He was tired of working for the man.

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What's poor and lives in Newry city council dump? Smelly mcD

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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What do you call a black man with a PhD and loving family? A nigger

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did u hear the one about helen keler neather did she

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why did ryan go to bed? because he is a growing boy and need it to keep in line for his study's i lied about him sleeping hes dead he was abducted

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops