What did the blind football player say to his coach? I cant see

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What's funnier then 24... The Holocost

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? Polite say "Hey you, get out of that tree."

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Why did the monkey die? he was stapled to a grenade

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What does Chuck Noris have under his beard? A chin

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what do you call a attractive blond haired girl who sings songs. pixie lott

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Why aren't elephants allowed in public pools? Because they are elephants.

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The other day I saw this dog. It said woof.

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Why did the rabbit jump? Because that's what rabbits do.

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How did the polar bear get the bottle of coke? He killed the little boy

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A guy walks in to a bar, waving a gun around. He acidentally shoots himself in the foot He died from the bloodloss.

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An airplane has 100 bricks on-board. If you drop one brick, how many bricks would be left? 99 -------------------------------------------------------------------- How do you put a giraffe inside a refrigerator? Open the refrigerator, put the giraffe inside, close the refrigerator. -------------------------------------------------------------------- How do you put an elephant inside a refrigerator? Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put the elephant inside, close the refrigerator. -------------------------------------------------------------------- The Lion King gathered all the animals from the land to a meeting. Everyone came, except one. Who was the animal? The elephant. He's still inside the refrigerator. ------------------------------------------------------------------- You want to cross a river, but you know that there are crocodiles there. There is no bridge, vines to swing from, etc. How do you cross the river? Swim across the river. The crocodiles are at the meeting with The Lion King. ------------------------------------------------------------------- So you swimmed over the river, but how did you still die? You were hit by the brick falling from the airplane.

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JAMIE STEGMAN IS A MASSSIVE DERP Jess Pots. YOUR A NOOB

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Why did the fish swim away from the boat when the fishermen put him back in the water? Because he obviously wasn't gonna get back in the boat.

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poo

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leon harney ya pikey

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what did the african child get for his birthday? water, it is a very scare resource were he comes from and is considered a great present

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JOHN to MARY: Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet So are you MARY to JOHN: Roses are red Violets are blue Who are you? JOHN to MARY: Roses are red I'm your husband MARY to JOHN: No! JOHN to MARY: WHAT??? MARY to JOHN: Ex Awkward silence. Mary moves out the next day.

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Sticks and stones may break my bones... and my pistol will kill you.

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A man walks into a bar...... He then wakes up in a hospital. along with a large bruise on his forehead.

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A drunken man grabbed a gun and shot his entire family to death. Luckily, a even drunker man had shot them moments before, so it really only served to ruin the perfectly good wall behind them with bullet holes.

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7

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What do you call a dragon with no wings? A komodo dragon

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What do you call cheese that is not yours? The fact that you do not own the cheese doesnt change its name

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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