Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because while he was swinging, his friends dared him to jump off and called him a chicken when he didn't. Still hesitant, he tried to jump off, but his arm caught on the swing chain and he fell face first into the tanbark. He needs reconstructive surgery to repair his face.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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How do you get a priest to cry? Stab him.

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SUBway eat fresh ZOMbies eat fleash

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What did the guy say to the blonde? "You're a blonde."

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what can you give to a millionaire to make him happy? sex

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A Christian asks God why there is so much pain and suffering in the world. Everyone around him moves away from the grown man talking to his imaginary friend.

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i once thought i could do crytal meth but then i thought naw better not

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poop is very very yummy.

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Why wasn't the black guy allowed into the bar? Because the bar was closed.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Shut up.

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Black Friday

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Why did the chicken attempt to cross the road? To see if it could.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? I t was dead. Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

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What did the car do? CRASH!

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Why did the mother tell her son to get a job. She was tired of buying Generic brand food.

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A baby seal walks into a club

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You know what's funny? Lot's of things.

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What is pink, female and has two dicks? A mother with two sons, both called Richard.

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Why did the Kitty stop meowing? Because its dead.

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What's worse than finding a pickle in a jar? Finding Snooki in a jar.

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you

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My friend asks me what my mom does for a living and i told him that she is a nurse. Then he says "That a good job because she is able to save lives". I quickly reply "She works in an abortion clinic".

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A man finds a mysterious lamp on the side of the road. He picks it up, rubs it, and sells the lamp at a pawn shop for $10,000. The man paid off his credit card debt and was happy that he did not have to file for bankruptcy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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