Why did the pumpkin stop using the jack hammer? Pumpkins cannot use power tools since they are nothing but an orange gourd. But, [for sport] say this ‘pumpkin’ was incarnate; one could assume he was done with his demolition work. He then would return the portable drill to the rental facility and get his deposit back.

what is the difference between joe diragi and jerry sandusky sabdusky only targets human little boys

How do you hold someone in suspense?

one day i went to bed

What did the statue say to the other statue? Nothing, statues cant speak.

why did the chicken cross the road? dunno. i wasnt there.

What's worse than finding a worm in you apple? The holocaust.

Why did the black men chase the chicken ? Because it wondered out of a barn.

What's worse, a dog dying or cancer? The Holocaust.

Why does Mario wear coveralls? Because it makes practical sense for his full time job as a plumber.

A blind man walks into the girls bathroom.

Greg told a joke. It wasnt funny...

whats brown and sticky? shit

Whats the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral?? Theres one less drunk.

What's black and red all over? Half a cat

An apple a day keeps a check next to the "I ate an apple today" box on my "what I did today" daily checklist.

What has feet but cannot walk? What has a beak but cannot peck? What has wings but cannot fly? A dead bird.

What did Steve jobs tell bill gates? Please pass the salt.

Whats worse then getting stabbed in the trachea by a aids infected knife? getting pounded anally by satan

What is black, white, and red all over? A bleeding zebra.

I once had my heart broken by my first true love. I then died, she was convicted of murder and my family grieved over my death.

Q. What did the dog say to the cat? A. Ruff.

Why wasn't the girl asked to the prom? Because she had cerebral palsy.

A man walks into a bar stark naked with a duck on his head. The bartender said "Dave, what's wrong?" The duck replies "Don't ask."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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