What is red and doesnt exist? No-tomato.

How do you stop a train? You don't, unless your the conductor in which case you would hit the brake.

What's big,long,and mostly men use it? A submarine

Paddy and mick were walking down the street when they saw some traffic lights. They proceeded to cross the road and continue on their journey.

Shit Happens....or sometimes it doesn't! As the person is taken to the hospital with severe constipation.

A man is shipwrecked on a desert island. One day, he finds an old lamp. When he rubs it, a genie appears. The genie says, "You have freed me. As a reward, I will grant you three wishes." The man smacks himself in the face and mutters, "Oh god, I'm seeing genies now. I must be delirious from lack of food and water." Several hours later, he dies.

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

Whats bloody and is dead. My son.

the police there was several calls from people in the sarounding area who heard screaming from ur basement

why did joe drown ? he had no arms

What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Where's my tractor?

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

A grasshopper walks into a bar... Bartender: "hey we have a drink named after you!" Grasshopper: "What, Kevin?"

a chicken walks into terry's house he penetrates himn

yo mama so fat she has diabetes.

Knock knock, Who's there? The cops, your parents are dead and now you are an orphan.

What do you call a dog with no legs? Max

A women in the kitchen.

How do u stop sky from being gay. You don't

WNBA

Rachel not blowing Robert.

What was the first thing the mother did when her baby was born? Weep. The baby was a was a stillborn.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No Neither has Stevie

A blind was staring at a girls ass. Her boyfriend promptly bludgeoned the man unaware of his illness.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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