The person below me is weird.

Person 1: Knock knock. Person 2: Come in.

The time and place do not matter because I'm a lesbian.

A dog walks into a bar. He asks for a drink in perfect english. People scream at the dog's ability to talk and scientists burt in and take the dog to dissect and study his brain, vocal chords, and dna.

What is worse than seeing a pile of dead minorities? Dropping a dollar.

What did the nerd say to the bully? Nothing. The bully killed him before he could say anything.

How do you tell the difference between a bomb and an Asian? One blows up.

Q: What do you call three black people in a car? A: Maltesers

What rhymes with Hitler? Walt Disney.

Yo mama's so fat, that she's fat.

What would George washington do if he was still alive He isn't so we dont have to worry about that.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad I didn't say orange? Well you shouldn't be. I came to tell you your family died in a car crash and you have AIDS.

What did Jesus say when he was nailed to the cross? AHHHH WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS!?!?!? MY HAND!!! MY HAND!!! AHHHHHHH!!!!! JUST KILL ME!!! PLEASE WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?!?! MY OTHER HAND AHHHH!!! HAHAAAAAAAAAaaaa..... AHHHHHHH WHY?!?! MY LEG!!!! MY FOOT NO!!!!! PLEASE!!!!! Ah AH AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAA HAHAHAaaa WHYYYYYYYYY!?

What's brown and sticky? A stick!

What do a fish and a moose have in common? They both live under water, apart from the moose.

Roses are red... Violets are blue... Unless your colour blind.

What has wings and windows? A bluebird, I was nodding about the windows!

"Happy Father's Day!" said the little boy to the old man. The old man broke out in tears because he had always wanted to be a father.

Why don't you play uno with Mexicans? Because they collect all the green cards.

A blonde, redhead, and a brunette are chatting outside a casino. The brunette directs a joke towards the blonde. "What's the difference between cotton candy and pork chops?" The blonde has heard the joke prior to this encounter and correctly completes it with sign language because she is deaf.

there was a tomatoes and it blew up and died. Why did it blow up? The Nazi's needed ketchup for there Jew Burgers

What did the Wife say to her husband about his Erectile Dysfunction? - Im sorry I dont know how to finish a joke based on this private a matter.

Why black guys are the fasttest runners? Because the slowers are already in prison

Q: Why did the bird fall out of the tree? A: It died. Q: Why did the snake fall out of the tree? A: It was stapled to the bird. Q:Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Peer pressure.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...