Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Alzheimer's, Who are you?

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If a tree falls down in the forest and no one is around to hear it, does God exist?

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why are black people so good at basketball? Because all they have to do is shoot, steal, and run.fctswity (sultably

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what did meredith and nick have in common an i

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Whats the difference between a Duck? One of its legs are both the same.

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'Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers.' Thats fantastic for Peter Piper

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Some dreams stay dreams, But some dreams come true. Some want to be god, They want to have made us. But I want to be an astronaught, So I can explore Uranus.

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The joke below is absolute shit.

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Why did the black guy scream? well, he just saw his friend get shot, and there was blood everywhere.

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What is the definition of a "crying shame"? Very similar to the definition of a shame, but moreso.

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Why did the woman start crying? She didn't have woman's rights... That's right, get back in the kitchen

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Q: How did the black man die? A: He got hit by a car, and we all know that this is painful.

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? He lacked the required muscular, integumentary, and nervous systems required to do so (among other essential bodily systems).

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There is a young boy called Clive, and his dad asks him what he wants for his birthday: "I would like one yellow golf ball please dad" he said. Of course, his father was quite surprised by his son's request, but nevertheless, he got him a yellow golf ball for his birthday. A few years later, clive does amazingly well at school and gets all As in his final exams. Filled with pride and love for his son, his father says to him: "I can't begin to tell you how proud i am of you, Clive. In fact, you can have a preasant! What do you want?" Clive thinks for a moment. "i would like one hundred yellow golf balls please!" His father was a bit annoyed at his strange request, but neverrtheless, gave Clive his yellow golf balls. A few years later, Clive wins the gold medal at the olymics for the 100m sprint. His father is very proud: "Son, i am so happy about the way you've turned out. You make me so proud. Is there anything you want me to do for you?" "can i have 1000 yellow golf balls please" Now his father got annoyed, he thought Clive was taking the piss. Eventually though, he calmed down and got clove the golf balls. Unfortunatley, Clive gets diagnosed with a deadly disease. His father is heartbroken. And as clive is lying on the hospital bed, his father moves close and speaks to him. "Son" he said, tears welling up in his eyes, "I just want to ask you one thing." "Ok," Clive said, as he too started to get emotional. "Why on earth did you want all those golf balls?" Clive looked deep into his father's eyes, as he took his last breath said: "I wanted them because- ack -splutter- ack" And he died.

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why was the man gay? Because its not a choice. its a lifestyle.

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What did the deaf, dumb, blind, black kid get for Christmas? Modern Warfare 3.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one.

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Why was Sally crying? Because she had a frog stapled to her face.

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toast points

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Why was Steve hungry? Because the last time he ate was yesterday.

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Q: How do you make a black man nervous? A: Threaten to kill his family.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Does this smell like chloroform to you?

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WNBA

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-Hey I know something funnier than 24, ---What? -25! Hey I know something funnier than 25. ---What? -The Holocaust!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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