Did you know Helen Keller had a swing set? Because she didn't.

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why was the boy sad. his father is an alcoholic that beats him daily.

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I advise you, don't mess with me, I know karate, kung fu,judo, tae kwon do, jujitsu, and 28 other dangerous words.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have amnesia ...where am I

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what do you call a rat with wings? an evolutionary masterpiece

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What is red and has seven dents? Snow White's Cherry.

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roses are head mydick is blue i live in somolia and i killed all the jews

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Have you seen the new Spiderman movie yet? No, Uncle ben hasn't seen it either.

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Why did Mark get paralyzed? Because he was a famed football player that went drafted for the 1st pick but was later hit so hard that his spine com pulsed and tore

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Q: What do racists call a disgusting filthy monkey that savagely jumps around in the jungle and steals white chicks? A: The same as the rest, Donkey Kong.

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What do you do after a murder kills your entire family? Nothing, he killed you too

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Nippies

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Ya mama so fat when she went on an elevater she had no chose but to go down Hahaha I'm so so funny haha Awesome mon yeah

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Boo." "I don't know anyone by that name. Please go away." -Louis

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HOW LONG is a Chinese name?

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A man walks into a bar... who cares what happens after that Charlie Sheen is winning and Osama Bin Laden is dead

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1: What is a gum wrapper with no gum? 2: A wrapper? 1: No.

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Who keeps knocking on the wall? My neighbors have sex a lot.

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Whats white and sticky and falls from the sky? The Cumming of the lord

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What is 0% sugar, 100% pure, 150% hyperbole, 90% bug-free, has 4815162342 lines of code, autonomous, is awesome, bigger than a breadbox, bread is pain, is bringin' home the bacon, classy, doesn't use the U-word, deja vu, deja vu (oh wait a moment), does barrel rolls doesn't avoid double negatives, doesn't bother with clones, Engage!, Enhanced!, Euclidean!, Excitement!, Exploding creepers, Finally complete!, finger-licking, full of stars, funky LOL, GOTY, Give Us Gordon, Indev, Ingots, and has an End? Minecraft!

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What's the worst place to land when parachuting off an airplane? A. In the middle of an ocean B. In a war zone C. Inside an active volcano D. In a justin beiber concert

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People made fun of a plant for walking into a bar. Little did they know it hadn't been watered for days.

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2 guys walk into a bar, a third guy carefully ducks under it

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Why did little Susie fall off the swing? Because she fell out the window and landed in soot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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