whats green and has wings ? a flying patch of astro turf

What do you do if you see an alien landing? This depends entirely on the circumstances under which the landing takes place. It also depends on the observed nature of the alien,but given the high unlikelihood of this occurrence, one may be safe in the knowledge that he or she will never have to deal with such a mental state of stress.

you are a åsshole :)

Knock Knock Who's there? Probably

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate black people, and mexicans too.

Q: why was the movie called the last house on the left? A: because they went to the last house that was on the left.

Q: What's blue and fuzzy A: Blue fuzz

Hey we just met And this is crazy But my name's Kony And I stole your baby

How do you talk to a mentally challenged person? You use words in a sequential order that would make sense grammatically

Why didn't God show up to Jesus' bar mitzvah? Because he doesn't exist.

If your uncle helped you off An horse, would you help your uncle jack off an horse?

Roses are red, viotels are blue. God made me pretty, what happened to you?

A man walks into a bar, he begins drinking and returns home visably drunk. His family disowns him as he is a recovering alchoholic who was three months sober.

How many 1 ft dwarfs does it take to climb up a 55 ft ladder? Only one. It's just a ladder. All you gotta do is climb up it.

Hey I just met you, and this is Crazy, but I think I Love You, so have my baby! ;)

When's the best time to go to the dentist? There is no best time, it is based on personal opinion and depending whether or not you have a conflicting schedule

Q. why are black people so good at sports? A. Hardwork and dedication.

Howdid we get copper piping we put a Pennie between two Jules

Why did the chicken cross the road? chickens are very unintelligent, and often walk around aimlessly with no purpose.

Roses are red. Violets are red. I have a gun. What did i do?

Roses are white Violets are black I'm colorblind That is sad

Why did the bus crash? What, you were expecting an answer? I was asking you

Why do everytime I go to toilet for number 2. I look into the toilet to see if this one's nicer than the last one.

Are you from Tennesse because my uncle grew up there and I was wondering if you knew him.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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