why did the puppy poop? he had too

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A girl asked for lip balm. She put some on and her lips exploded.

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Why did the Skyrim guard stop adventuring? He got cancer.

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a. why? b. because I wanted

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Not doing your Webtime on a Friday!!

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He threw it, because he had parkinson's!

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It died. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first koala. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? Peer Pressure.

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Pineapples have a smaller volume than the sun

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What did one tube of glue say to the other tube of glue? Nothing. Inanimate objects, such as a tube of glue, however adhesive the contents of said objects are, are in no way capable of advanced speech, let alone basic communication.

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your mom died.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What do you call a dolphin that drives a Mercedes Benz? Nothing. Dolphins can't drive.

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Why was Steve hungry? Because the last time he ate was yesterday.

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A Polish man is walking down the street carrying a brown paper bag. He runs into one of his buddies, who asks, "Hey! What's in the bag?" The man tells his friend that he has some fish in the bag. His friend says, "Well, I'll make you a bet. If I can guess how many fish you have in the bag, you'll have to give me one." The man replies, "I'm sorry, my friend, but gambling is against my morals, especially when my family's only nutrition for the week is on the line."

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why dont we just take bikini bottom and push it somewhere else

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Q: What do you call a black person with one leg? A: In modern American society, it is proper etiquette to adress somebody by their first name.

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A blind man walks into a pole.

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how do you get a cat out of a tree? with boomerangs

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0 + 0 = 0

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Why did the fish cross the road? Because fish don't have legs and can't walk anywhere

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was in a cage being carried by a farmer.

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9

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Did you hear the joke about Helen Keller? No. You don't need to, it's quite inappropriate.

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Why did the girl fall of the swing? Because she was shot in the face by a lone gunman.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops