Whats worse than 911..? The plane ride there.

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What did johnny say when he fell down the stairs? Nothing he snapped his neck

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Haikus are awesome, but sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? A: This is a highly unlikely circumstance due to the fact that there are no wild chickens and most chicken coops are nowhere near a road

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand. He orders a lemonade and leaves promptly

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Why did the girl fall of her chair? The chair can only hold so much weight.

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Do you ride the bus to school or do you take your lunch?

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Why did Paul Walker cross the road? He wasn't wearing his seatbelt.

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A dyslexic paraplegic walks into a bra

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A priest and a rabbi are walking down the street when they see an orphanage on fire. "Oh my god!" says the rabbi. "We have to save the children!" "Screw the children!" says the priest. "Out of what?" replies the rabbi.

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a gay couple walks into a bar and get a drink

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Hey, guess what? What? Dammit!

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Why does life suck? Because it does

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raisin boogers

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She is so fast We call her Email Instead of Emily...

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How do you keep a black man out of your back yard? Tell him to go away.

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What did paul say to bill? "Hi, I'm Paul"

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Come out with your hands up.

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A little boy ran to the pool to see how long he could hold his breath. He slipped and fractured his skull.

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Martin Skrtel walks into a bar The bar breaks, Martin then pays for any damages caused

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An early Jewish man walks into a bar where a number of stormtroopers have gathered for drinks and is taken into custody and then transported by railcar to a camp where he and other persecuted minorities are deliberately imprisoned in a relatively small space with inadequate facilities where they await their eventual mass execution.

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What is the last digit of Pi? Pi is an infinite decimal sequence, and therefore has no last number, but if it did, it would presumably be somewhere from 0-9.

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Gun Control

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A baby elephant steps on a lego. First thought, auch, huh ?! Actually, the lego was fine with it and so was the baby elephant. Now they're married and are expecting a baby legophant.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops