What does Tupac and Elvis Presley have in common? They're dead but most of the people think they aren't.

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knock knock whos there? knock knock whos there knock knock you final decide to open the door to find a deaf man needing directions.

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A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel in the front of his pants. He is given some very strange looks from the patrons both due to the fact that he has a steering wheel in his pants and because people wearing traditional pirate garb are a rarity.

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What did Little Jojo get for Hanukah? Nothing he is Muslim.

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What do you call a hard working black man? A hard working black man.

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Why did the girl fall She didn't she was eaten by a bear

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Why is cheese yellow? Answer: I don't know, I was hoping that you would know.

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What is orange and smells like a jewish cat. Nothing

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What do you call an englishman who wakes up in Africa Confused

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What did the scientist call a spider? An arachnid.

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2 black guys are riding in a car, whos driving? The cops.

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Shoulda had a V8 ...or not because I am severely allergic to tomato's.

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Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

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Why do black people eat at KFC? Because KFC serves good food at reasonable prices.

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Q-- Why did the boy stop playing football? A -- He had to go for his tea

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What is Debbie short for? She has no legs.

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pickle sniffer

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Two Blondes walk into a bar. They each enjoy a refreshing drink before heading home to greet their family

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falling didnt make the difference

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Are you from Tennessee? Because you accent is really not hiding it

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock-knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

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Want to hear a funny joke? Womens rights.

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Whys it so cold? Nuclear winter.

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What is invisible and smells like carrots? The smell of Carrots. Pretty sure you can't see smells.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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