Why was the child lying in the scrap yard? because he was being torn apart by guard dogs.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I'm not sure but my guess is that there was some logical reasoning behind the action.

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I like my women the way I like my coffee: Without a penis.

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why did your parents die? because I thought it was funny...

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So, there's a lion loose in Colchester. Should've gone to Specsavers... [L]

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what did the white singer say to the black rapper? I would like to do a song with you seeing as how we have 2 separate audience types i believe this would prove the song to be successful

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chuck norris

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Why did Susy fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Susy.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I thought I was ugly But then I met you

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How many pollacks does it take to screw in a lightbuld? Likely the same number as is required when people of non-polish descent screw in lightbulds. Overall however it is variable based on the number or bulbs, position of bulbs in relation to ceiling, potential shakiness of required ladder, and desired efficiency. Please reference GE's lightbuld home instillation handbook for further information or alternately contact your local electrician or handy neighbor.

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A man on crutches walked across the road. Suddenly he fell and sprained his foot. He was pleased that he was carrying crutches.

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Why did John fall down the stairs? Because John is a paraplegic and is incapable of going to down stairs without aid.

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civil rights

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what is a bike without wheels? not a bike.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 6 is a homophobe and 7 is a little fruity.

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Your momma's so fat that she is at risk for heart disease and diabetes.

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Q: Why was the blonde disappointed with her trip to England? A: She found out Big Ben was only a clock

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Q: what's brown and rhymes with snoop? A: Dr. Dre

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Tell me you're a rapist. You're a rapist. This joke makes no sense. Mashed potatoes.

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Yo mama is so fat that she has to buy plus size clothes because small size clothes would be inappropriate for her to wear.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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(This is a joke made up by the young son of a friend of mine many years ago. It is still one of my favorite jokes.) Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Ever heard of carpel tunnel? Well after that girl it was more like carpal toungal

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Wat is brown and sticky? A stick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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