What do a tree and a boy have in common? They both cry when you hit them with an axe... except the tree.

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What do you think JFK would be doing if he was alive today? Yelling for help and trying to somehow escape his coffin.

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What is invisible and smells like carrots? The smell of Carrots. Pretty sure you can't see smells.

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why did the little boy cry about his dog, it was hit by a train.

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"You two form fours while I get the other one"

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What's worse than going in the wrong direkshun? ...My spelling

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Ask me If I'am a tree are u a tree? no.....

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Where's Waldo? Six feet under.

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There once was a man from Madrass Whose balls were made out of brass This was incredibly uncomfortable and embarrassing for him. It also affected his sexual potency and rendered him infertile, Which drastically affected his ability to enter and sustain relationships with women.

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Time is irrelevant in this scenario because if this question is based in the United States it is highly unlikely an elephant will be near a fence you own, let alone sit on it, an activity rarely done by elephants and usually projected by humans onto other animals.

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Knock knock. Who's there. Alex. Alex who? Your brother Alex. Oh, please come in.

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Why did the New York Times cancel Otis Redding's subscription? Because he died.

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How did the girl get hit by a car? Better question, How did the car get in the kitchen?

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0 + 0 = 0

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Yo mamas so fat that she decided to get a gastric bypass to help lose the weight.

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A Chinese man walks into a bar. With his thick accent, he finds it difficult to order drinks.

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what does the homeless man do when he gets home? nothing, he's homeless

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Why did the monkey fall out the tree, He was dead

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Suzie

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Why do you always find a dead baby in the last place you look? Because once you've found it, you stop looking.

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What did the cancer patient get for Christmas? 2 weeks to live...

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Q: what did the man say to the woman? A: hi

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A white person at Harvard

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Why did little Timmy start crying? Because he was shot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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