This is a little story about four people named Everybody, Somebody, Anybody, and Nobody. There was an important job to be done and Everybody was sure that Somebody would do it. Anybody could have done it, but Nobody did it. Somebody got angry about that because it was Everybody's job. Everybody thought that Anybody could do it, but Nobody realized that Everybody wouldn't do it. It ended up that Everybody blamed Somebody when Nobody did what Anybody could have done

thumb_up thumb_down +18

An asian, mexican, and a black guy walk into a bar, and the bartender says, "get the hell out"

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Roses are red, violets are blue, I don't know where I am, I'm blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

How do you stop moles from digging in your garden? Take the shuvel away.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A man is gay, a parade is held in his honor. A man is black, a holiday is named after him. A man is white, he laughs at the stupidity in the world today.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What did the farmer say to the woodchucks chucking his wood? Excuse me, not to be rude but i worked very hard splitting and stacking that wood and would appreciate it if you would stop throwing it in the water.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did the corpse come to life? Because number 5 is alive!

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did suzy fall of the swing? -she had no arms... Why couldn't she get back up? -she had no friends

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Your momma's so fat that she has a body fat percentage of 37 and is clinically overweight.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did Johnny fall down? Because I threw tropical fruit at him.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A random guy walks into your house and says hi. You say SHUTUP

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why was Adam sad? His wife found him cheating with several women which led to a lengthy and messy divorce and him losing custody of his two children and his house.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why was Steve hungry? Because the last time he ate was yesterday.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

hey i just met you.... and this might just sound crazy but i have a bad case of short term memory .....were we talking????

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

what do you call a screwdriver that thinks it'sa hammer? a screwdriver

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did the fish cross the road? Because fish don't have legs and can't walk anywhere

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He threw it, because he had parkinson's!

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did steve cry? Because he got punched.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Girl : What's a anti joke ? Boy : it's you .

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What do you think JFK would be doing if he was alive today? Yelling for help and trying to somehow escape his coffin.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What is worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Getting raped by a giant scorpion

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What do a tree and a boy have in common? They both cry when you hit them with an axe... except the tree.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops