Why did the chicken cross the road? The screams were loud. It was just one big fire behind him. He and his fellow chickens had been trapped. They thought they were being freed... They thought wrong. The guards herded them in and then the heat started. The fires began to rage. His friends, his allies, his brothers, were falling dead, burning, beside him. He had to escape. He did not think, only acted. Lashing out at the guard, he knocked him down and ran. He ran and ran until he could run no more, and he still kept running. He could still hear his brothers' screams. He could still see their faces burning before his eyes. He reached the road, and finally stopped. He looked around. The screams had stopped. The heat had left his body. But then another sound came. Yelling. The guards. They were following him. He tried to keep running. But he just couldn't. He was finished. He fell on the road, sliding himself along as quickly as he could. He hadn't run this far to be caught by the guards. He stopped. He could go no further. He looked up and saw the blue sky, cloudless and free. The last thing he heard was a roaring engine. The guards never found his body.

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what is the difference between Stephani and a whale? A whale is skinnier... get the harpoonns

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile? "Get in the Batmobile"

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65% of people are starving 32% are over 190 lbs. Think about it

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Whats worse than a pile of dead baby's? Being raped by a giant scorpion. Well that escalated quickly. Also i'm gonna call the cops.

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whats funny? a relatsion ship for 16 hours

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So joe diragi walks out of a gay bar...

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Terry Stockton wasn't really hit.

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What do you do if you see an alien landing? This depends entirely on the circumstances under which the landing takes place. It also depends on the observed nature of the alien,but given the high unlikelihood of this occurrence, one may be safe in the knowledge that he or she will never have to deal with such a mental state of stress.

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A man walked into a bar. It was very crowded so he decided to leave.

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A boy says he is going to commit suicide. To stop him, a friend tells him not to do it, he'll regret it later in life.

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What did the kid say when his parents were killed? Nothing. He's a vegetable

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religion.

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What' do you call a fart in a box? Your mom's puzsy

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why did the pirate have a patch? to crack the software he had downloaded

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Shit... Shit who? Wrong house... Do I know you Shitt Ronghouse? Yes. Please come in. Okay.

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Walruses are basically saber-toothed seals. That does not affect the fact that they are awesome.

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What does Spiderman do everyday? Aunt May

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? The holocaust What's worse than the holocaust? Two worms in you apple what worse than 2 worms in your apple? Two holocausts

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What do you call a man with a towel on his head? A good target.

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Okay, I just really want you to trust me again,

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A Christian walks in into a bar . . . mitzvah.

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What's invisible and smells like a carrot? A rabbit's fart.

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Why are children like books? They are highly flammable if covered in gasoline.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops