What do you get hanging from an apple tree? Sore Arms.

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I had a date. She was a pegasister. Since MLP was magical, I disappeared.

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Theres a man with 2 eyes.

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KASEEM IS CRAP AT GEARS OF WAR THIS IS NOT A JOKE ITS TRUE (FACT) PLAYSTATION IS BETTER THEN XBOX (BIGGEST JOKE EVER) IV HAD BOTH, SO SHUT UP PS3 BOYS AKA GIRLS

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What did the cow say to the chicken? Moo

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rosses are red voilets are pinkey your mams pussy is really stinky

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a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

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Whats worse than a rotten tomato. a fridge hitting your baby.

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So a dog walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "Quickly, someone give me the number for animal control."

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Why did the girl fall out of the swing? She had no arms.

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So there are 5 people on a plane the president, a movie star, and man who is on the verge of making world peace, the smartest man in the world, and the pope the piolt has a heart atack at and the plane will crash soon there are only 4 parachutes. So the first is Obama and he saysI won a Nobel piece prize and I run American see ya later and he takes the parachute next Steven hawking says sory pope Im taking this because I don't believe in God and black holes are cool so he takes the parachute and jumps out. Next Charlie Sheen says I need to entertain people and keep the drug dealers in business so he. Takes the parachute and jumps out. Then Francis turns to the hippie and says if you achive world peace it may help eliminate some poverty so you take the last paratute and jump out then the hippie says in return no its OK Steven Hawking took my back back. When they land they decide to serch for Steven's body and they find nothing. You see Steven Hawking had taken his own paratute with him and took the Hippies backpack to sell it and make some money

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Three peasants were brought in front of the King to be rewarded for their assistance during a drought. The King told them that they could each request one thing from him that he could provide. The first man asked to be rich, so the King ordered his guards to fetch a large sack that was filled to the brim with gems and gold pieces. The man thanked the King and left his palace joyfully. The second man asked for a larger house so the King gave him access to one of his many castles. He hurriedly left, eager to try out his new home for size. The third man asked for a cat so the King gave him a cat.

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What do you get when you hit a deer? A dead deer, which you should probably take home to eat - wouldn't want it to go to waste.

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Roses are red Violets are blue get down or i will shoot

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If you're having Kony problems, I feel bad for you son. He's stolen 99 kids and your posters saved none.

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hy-way is-way is-thay oke-jay pelled-say eird-way? ecause-bay its-way in-way IGLATIN-PAY

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Why do girls have bumps around their nipples ? -it's brai for suck here .

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What's spotted and has dildos strapped to their neck? Jews

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a cannibal and like to burn people.

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A women in the kitchen.

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Have you ever heard the story of Mikey Braford? Every morning when he was little, his father would fill a gym sock with nickels and beat him with it. Mikey has severe attachment disorder and frequent suicidal thoughts.

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Anagram.

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How do you stop a bus You throw a fridge at it

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how do you know Newcastle are losing? its 5 past 3

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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