I now pronounce you man and lion. You may now kiss the pride.

A-S-S-H-O-L-E!!!! Everybody A-S-S-H-O-L-E!!!!

What is worse than a worm in your apple? An apple in your worm!!!

How many Jews can you fit in a Volkswagon? 2 in the front seat, 3 in the back.... and that's it because the holocaust never happened.

why was the little girl crying? because she was molested

What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Where's my tractor?

bitches be crafty.

A priest and rabbi walk into a bar, they order a few drinks, then call a cab to go home.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I got to go now Gonna take a poo.

Do you have to make frequent trips to the bathroom? Do you have a weak or broken stream? Do you leave the bathroom feeling satisfied? Do your frequent trips to the bathroom interrupt everyday activities? Well you should take Lunesta and just sleep. Then you wouldn't have this problem.

A man comes home from work and finds his wife in bed with his next-door neighbor. Furious, he shouts 'What's the meaning of this?!' And his wife answers 'A pronoun used to identify a specific person or thing close at hand or being indicated or experienced'.

This is a swimmer Joke. Chuck Norris once lapped a kid in the 50 free... LONG COURSE.

If a tree falls in the forest and nobody is around, does anyone really care?

1 man walks up to a tiger and eats cheese toast with brownies and butter and wonders about the stars the end james

Whats black and white and red all over Racial violence

Why did the man die? He got shot!

Why is cheese yellow? Answer: I don't know, I was hoping that you would know.

What is large, white, and can't climb trees? A refrigerator.

Why is Tom Garrick gay Answer- Because he is

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What do you call a box with a dead Jew in? A coffin.

The black man leaves the strip club.

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead all walk into a bar. Because, often, friends go out together in social situations.

There is a young boy called Clive, and his dad asks him what he wants for his birthday: "I would like one yellow golf ball please dad" he said. Of course, his father was quite surprised by his son's request, but nevertheless, he got him a yellow golf ball for his birthday. A few years later, clive does amazingly well at school and gets all As in his final exams. Filled with pride and love for his son, his father says to him: "I can't begin to tell you how proud i am of you, Clive. In fact, you can have a preasant! What do you want?" Clive thinks for a moment. "i would like one hundred yellow golf balls please!" His father was a bit annoyed at his strange request, but neverrtheless, gave Clive his yellow golf balls. A few years later, Clive wins the gold medal at the olymics for the 100m sprint. His father is very proud: "Son, i am so happy about the way you've turned out. You make me so proud. Is there anything you want me to do for you?" "can i have 1000 yellow golf balls please" Now his father got annoyed, he thought Clive was taking the piss. Eventually though, he calmed down and got clove the golf balls. Unfortunatley, Clive gets diagnosed with a deadly disease. His father is heartbroken. And as clive is lying on the hospital bed, his father moves close and speaks to him. "Son" he said, tears welling up in his eyes, "I just want to ask you one thing." "Ok," Clive said, as he too started to get emotional. "Why on earth did you want all those golf balls?" Clive looked deep into his father's eyes, as he took his last breath said: "I wanted them because- ack -splutter- ack" And he died.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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