"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "You're not that bad...you're still better at giving hand jobs than your dad is."

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Q:Why did the boy cry? A: because his mom was hit by a bus Q: why did the boy wipe his face? A:he was covered in his mother blood and threatened all the witness who saw him push his mother into the bus

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Q: What do you call a grammatically incorrect horse? A: An horse

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What did the man say to the duck? Nothing ducks don't talk.

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What's it called when Justin Bieber has sex? Sex. The specific person partaking in sexual intercourse does not change the term used to describe it.

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A boy wakes up in the morning and says i"'m feeling kind of fishy today," the boy's dad walks in and relpies "that's because you are a fish."

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What is orange and smells like a jewish cat. Nothing

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Is the boy sleeping? No, he's dead!

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What's the difference between Cindy Crawford and a Snickers bar? Nothing. One is a mediocre actress, the other is a peanut based bar of chocolate confectionary.

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What do you call an arab flying a 747? A pilot.

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There is a cat with a collar animal control takes of the coller and and says who cares it's not Our fault there cat is an outdoor cat the girl who lost her cat was crying all year long spending all her money wishing for her cat back and wishing that there was no such thing as animal control That girl was me and I'm against animal control

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whats the one about not giving a crap? oh yea this one

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Whats worse than malaria? Dying from it.

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what do all 21 year olds have in common? there all 21

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What do you get when you have 10 kids in a church? A lot of rape cases.

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WHat did Helen Keller get for Christmas? an ipod

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Knock knock. Who's there? Louis. Louis? Go away!!! Your jokes are so bad! Geez, you guys really don't like me. GET OUT!!! (Door slams; Louis shuffles away with a sad look on his face) -Louis

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Why isn't pluto a planet anymore? Nasa decided it was too small

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What was Steve Jobs' favorite fruit? Grapes.

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i just got all five seasons of big bang theory in the mail for xmas... i'm divorcing my wife.

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What goes in dry, comes out wet and pleases two people. A teabag, you pervert.

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Why did I write this anti-joke? Because I am generally not that funny.

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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"33"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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