I was Born ready I was born naked.

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Knock knock Who's there? Carrot Carrot who? Carrot in the tree house, cause it's orange.

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Why didn't Tyron run from the police? He had no legs.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because She's Dead.

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Q: Why did the bear fall out of the tree? A: Because humans tranquilized him, brought him to an animal shelter 100 miles away from his home. Then after he got out he got hit by a car and died. PETA is watching.....always

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Whats the quickest way to get famous? kill the president

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs because disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion).

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A blonde walked into a hair salon. She got her hair dyed black, as she is sick and tired of jokes that scrutinize those with blonde hair.

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A German challenged an Englishman to a duel But their neigbours found out and alerted the police

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Why is it stupid to call your son Bethany? It is commonly a girl's name.

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A skinny white prisoner dropped his soap in the shower. So the big, ripped, black prisoner who was showering next to him picked up the soap and handed it back to him. The skinny white prisoner said "Thank you" and continued with his shower.

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A dog walks into a bar, animal control is called and he is put down as he is suffering from rabies.

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how did i know i had a new puppy?...... i found out when i was scraping it off my truck tire

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Q. Whats blue and looks like a bucket? A. a blue bucket Q. whats green and looks like a bucket? A. a blue bucket in disguise.

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How many women can fit on a bus? It depends on the size of the bus.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Most poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

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Roses are red violets are purple what the hell happened to your ugly face

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Finding this website has distracted me and has taken up a large majority of my time.

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How do you stop a black person from drowning?.. Take your foot off his head

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why did the cow cross the road because pigs were not flying i had to write it hurts

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Why didn't the girl's ring fit? She had no fingers.

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this guy didnt get any pussy last night so go easy on him I I I V

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What did one Teacher say to the other teacher? Nothing. The first teacher has a horrible drinking habbit which is getting out of hand, He beats his wife and children each night after his drinks at the bar. His parents have stopped all contact and he found some divorce papers in his wifes draw, also saying she would be getting full costudy of the children. He has lost the majority of his friends and didnt want to loose another one, and kept his problems to himself.

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sky silverstein

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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