I walk in to a bar, ask for a beer, get drunk, walk away and.... hmmm.. how could I finish the joke??..

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Why does tundes food suck? Because he is from Africa and the cuisine is different

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A blind man crosses the street... he is hit by a car

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There are two types of people in this world, those that can't count

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Why did billy fall off his bike? Because billy was a loaf of bread.

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What do a banana and helicopter have in common? Neither is a police officer

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This is supposed to be an anti-joke.

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Once there was a pig named Poga. When he grew up, he was slaughtered and made into bacon.

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why did suzie fall off the swing? she had no arms why did suzie get hit by a bus? she was blind knock knock whos there? not suzie.

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What separates man from animal? Divorce.

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How do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot.

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Your boat breaks down on the highway. How many squirrels does it take to eat a bannana? Squirrels do not eat bannanas but it would probably take a monkey 1.5 milliseconds.

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You can pick you're friends, you can pick you're nose, but you can't run over a pedestrian.

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What did the Amazonian tribesman say to the European explorer? Nothing, he was focussing on eating him.

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LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL -LOL GUY

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A mexican, Japanese, and American man are eating lunch one day at work by the window. The Mexican says, "Wow! If I get a taco one more time for lunch, I'm gonna jump off this window!" The Japanese man says, "Wow! If I get a bowl or ramen one more time for lunch, I'm gonna jump off this window!" The American says" If I get grilled cheese one more time, I'm gonna jump off this window!" The next day, the mexican jumped off because he got a taco. Then, the japanese man jumped off for getting ramen. Then, the American jumped off for getting a grilled cheese sandwhich. At the funeral, the mexican wife said, "Oh if i knew he was gonna jump, I would'nt have packed it." The japanese wife said, "If I knew he was gonna jump, I wouldn't have packed it either." The American wife didn't say anything because she was hit by a bus.

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What`s the difference between a dead baby and a pencil? I don`t keep a pencil in my backpack

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Whats worse tan finding a worm in your apple? Being touched by Michael Jackson

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Why could the red heading boy sing higher notes than the blonde headed boy? He was castrated at birth.

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Life is like the Titanic. You cruise along on course and everything is great -- until you hit an iceberg and 1,517 people die.

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Knock Knock Who's there A girl scout want to buy some cookies to raise money for my cardiac surgery?

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what's the difference between a pound of liver and vomit? £3.24

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Why did Billy fall off the slide? Someone threw a refridgerator at his face.

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How many people like gang rape? 9 out of 10

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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