Why couldn't the ten-year-old get into the pirate movie? Because it was rated PG-13

thumb_up thumb_down -40

A man is wrongfully convicted of murder and sent to prison. After a lengthy appeals process the guilty verdict is overturned and he walks away a free man.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Bill: My vagina is itchy. Tom: You don't have a vagina. It was later found out that bill had a sex change and did have an itchy vagina, due to an STI. He later died of cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

You know you're a redneck when you come from a rural area and behave as such.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Why did you chicken cross the road? C u n t.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

What did hitler say to the jacket potato? Your fucked now!

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Bill Clinton, George Bush, and Barak Obama all found a magical lamp. The Genie appeared and said, "I will grant one wish for all of you, and one wish only." Bill wished to become president. The other two thought that would be pretty cool and did the same. (ic3)

thumb_up thumb_down -46

What do you call a black guy in a Walmart? A customer. You prejudice dullard!

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Two clarinets were locked in a case for 20 years. They both play well.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

A rabi and a priest go out for a coffee they talk for a while and go on there way

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Whats worse than a dead baby? Two dead babys.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Jimmy: I'm like hey, what's up, hello. Jon: I've already met you.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What is similar about Michael Jackson and Walmart? Nothing they have nothing to do with each other

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A man walks into the bar and orders a drink. This is what you do in a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

There is a mom a dad and a son, they walk into the museum and the dad is in the bathroom.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Did you hear about the man who played the lottery? He lost.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A man looks both ways before crossing the street. He gets hit by an airplane.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Think of a number, add it by 7, subtract it by 2, and multiply it by 4. Now close your eyes, isn't it dark?

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Whats the worst thing about dying? Your not alive anymore.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What does a spider Pig do? Nothing. They dont exist.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why was the emo kid sad? Because he gets raped by his dad every night

thumb_up thumb_down +21

rodents are bed violents are glue i have lysdexia and short attention spa

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops