How am I supposed to eat soup without an envelope?

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What did the vibrator say to the condom? Watch, I'll get laid before you do!!!

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What's the difference between a baby and a tea bag? Tea bags don't scream when I dip them in boiling water

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Paper or plastic? Yes...

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How many Russians can you fit in a Mini Cooper? It depends on how big they are.

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What do you get when you cross a chicken and a turkey? Just a sort of mixed bird thing.

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Knock, knock. MAN: Who's there? ... MAN: Hello? Anyone out there? ... MAN: Must be the wind.

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whats red round and gets smaller? a baby combing its hair with a potatoe peeler

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So a guy walks up to a gay guy and says: "You are a fag." The gay guy says: "That is very offensive, you jerk." So the guy says: "Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't know what it meant" and the gay guy says: "I accept your apology." Then the gay guy crosses the street and gets hit by a bus

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A guy walks into a doctor's office and says: "Doctor! Doctor! You gotta help me! One day I'm a teepee, and the next day I'm a wigwam, and then the next day I'm a teepee, and then the next day I'm a wigwam again. The doctor says: Sir, we've been over this 100 times! You have stage 4 pancreatic cancer...

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How did the fat man die? He was fed porrage until he died. Who killed the fat man? Leonardo DaVici How did Leonardo Da Vinci die? Natural causes (Actually I have no idea how Leonardo Da Vici died but if I am wrong please correct me) Thank You for your coperation.

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What happened to the chinese man who walked into a wall with a boner? He hurt himself.

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Why did the dog lick the boy's leg? Cause when the boy blew up his leg landed in the doghouse

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Everyone is equal. It doesn't matter if you're black, red, yellow, brown, or normal.

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Chick Norris... Enough said

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side!

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Joey and Jack walked into a bar, and their friend Satan asked if they heard about Jesus, and they said No.

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What is funny about civil and women's rights? Nothing, they are very serious matters.

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What did the Asian father say to his son when he got a b? Good job son!

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Why did the potato cross the road? It didn't. A potato is a vegetable. It cannot walk, think or speak.

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What did the drug addict say to the doctor? I am a drug addict and am in need of help and rehabilitation.

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how many dicks can you fit into mia khalifa's ass

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What worse than seeing a worm in your apple? Half a worm in your apple.

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Why did the kitten cross the road? Because its owners abandoned it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops