Why did the skeleton not go to the party? Because without the aid of various ligaments and muscles that would be attached to the average human being's skeleton, he was not able to move himself so much as an inch.

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i am a dino. RAWR.

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A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

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what do you make if you get a cow, then kill it. ...Steak

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a cat gets mauled by a dog. it died later that day

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Why do things made by Glen taste so good? Because he has mastered the cream

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Why is 6 scared of 9? Because 9 is a zombie.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I just sharpened this hatchet Don't make me use it!

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Why did piglet look down the toilet for pooh? He had a horrible mental illness

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Your momma is so fat when she heard about the quater pounder she thought it was for a quarter.

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Q:What's the difference between a lake? A: a tree, because motorcycles dont have doors... :) crf

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what is the best part about sleeping with twenty six year olds? they are usually very experienced in sexual intercourse so there isn't much awkwardness

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What's worse than getting shot? Getting shot twice

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Knock knock. Who's there? Dog. Dog who? I have a dog.

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Q: What did the Rabbi say to the butcher? A: "Do you have the time?"

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Knock knock. Who's there? Ryan. Ryan who? Ryan Seacrest.

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why was the boys t.v broken? because he through it out the window

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What's the worst part about a plane with 500 people in it crashing? It might leave a dent in the ground.

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If your canoe is stuck in a tree with no headlights, how many pancakes does it take to get to the moon. False, snakes don't have armpits

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Why are some people so barbaric? Because some people are German.

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roses are red violets are blue i am retarded i like pancakes

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What smells like diarrhea and looks like poop? A rotten banana.

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The last head of Satan, is oh but what you blamed upon Your faults, Your sins. The thoughts of Madness written here, yet potent enough to cloud Your thoughts.... Wait not forever children of man, as eternity is at its peak, the false prophet IS AMONGST US! But what side is he on? The last ditch attempt to protect humanity from a raging jealous vengeful God? Say it is not so! Say that darkness is not the only thing standing against you and eternal damnation... ...Yet you killed his only true child, you stole his name, his essence... Even his Identity... ...Even the Angels white are powerless to stop him, Your maker, Your true maker, for what is the grief of the holy, from which you took his only son... ...As you celebrate once and once anew... :...Merry CHRISTmas, to all of those of you all now left behind... Celebrate it well, as before the world reaches 2017, is where it all ends...

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Why did the dog run away from home? Because the owner left the door open.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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