What did romeo say to Juliet? A lot of things, Then he gave her a flower.

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your mamas so fat she tried to hang herself but the rope broke.

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yo mama's so fat, yo mama's so ugly; your mothers breasts sag with such severity that the late great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks

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I know that a lot of people don't like morbid jokes, for it isn't everybody's cup of liquidized dead baby.

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How do you steal from a sushi buffet? You say please.

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What's green and says I'm a frog? A talking frog

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It had gotten out of its coop.

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A man had two kids who he loved very much but would always come home in a bad mood. On a Friday after returning home, he tells his wife, "I hate my life," then proceeds to take his anger out on her. If you were expecting for this to be a joke, then you clearly have some messed up humor. Abuse in the household isn't to be taken lightly.

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Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because its head is so far from its body.

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A man walks outside and sits down to eat his sandwich.

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A Redhead, a Blonde, and a Brunette are all standing on top of a cliff in Ireland. They took a few pictures, and all in all it was a lovely vacation.

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I FEEL LIKE I'M RIDING ON A CLOUD actually it's physically impossible to ride on clouds because they are sparsely situated ice particles.

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Why did Mary fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Mary.

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Two cows were in a feild, one said "moo" and the other said "i was going to say that!"

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what do you do when a blond throws a grenade at you? run

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Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting yours asshole clawed by a grizzly

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What's the difference between an elephant and a grape? They're both purple. Except for the elephant.

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Why is Osama dead? He got shot.

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What's long and black The unemployment line

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Oh..wait...that's actually an anti-joke already...

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a pizza? A pizza can feed a family of four.

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Haikus are easy. But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

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Did you hear about Osama Bin Laden? He's dead.

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If you listen to Justin Beiber all day long, what do you become? Very hungry and thirsty. And you need to go to the restroom.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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