What do you call a person who is deaf. It doesn't matter, they wont be able to hear it when you call them.

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what do chinese kids make for fathers day? shoes

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Q: What's the worst part about having sex with a cougar? A: Dying...

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Whats black, dead, and hangs from a tree in my backyard? Your Mom

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your momma is so fat she has diabetes

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What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13

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What do you get when you cross a baby and a chainsaw? Life imprisonment.

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Why did the kid cross the road? To show his friends that he had guts. And man, did he have guts.

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You can pick your friends you can pick your nose but you cant pick your friends nose.

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Why was the boy laughing at Sally? Because Sally was a man

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There once was a man named bulagala moo moo boom chicka boom. Sometimes, when wipe the toilet tissue breaks and my fingers get all dirty. Good thing I have insurance!

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Why was the baby crying? He had just witnessed his parent gets brutally murdered.

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What do a priest, a rabbi, and an asian have in common? They all don't know each other.

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Friend: Dude are you going to see the hunger games? Me: But i alreay seen it Friend: Dafuq? its not even out yet. Me: African children invented the hunger games. Friend: -.-

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How many Terry Pratchetts does it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

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What's long and hard on a black man? Second Grade

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A fat black guy walks into a pet store and asks if he can have a chicken. The cashier says "what do you want a chicken for?" He says " I need to lose weight so I'm hoping to eat its all natural eggs" So the cashier gives him the chicken and the fat black guy lost 50 pounds.

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Why was the little girl crying? There was a frog stapled to her forehead.

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A man wakes up in his bed and looks at the clock. He realises he is gonna be late for work. He quickly gets out of bed, into the bathroom, has a shower, puts his deodorant on and brushes his teeth, gets dressed, and goes in his car. He drives out of his garage and drives to his work but gets stuck in traffic. He then gets to the car park of his work and parks his car. He gets out, goes up the elevator to his floor, when the elevator door opens to his floor, he quickly says hello to Terrance and goes to his bosses office. And guess what the boss says? You're late.

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You're mama's so stupid, she decided to go back to school and finish her degree in Russian Literature to improve her self-esteem and maybe -- just maybe -- save her marriage, which had been on the rocks, mostly due to her intolerable self-loathing.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?' The horse say " i have testicular cancer."

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What is white and flys at you from a tree? A refridgarator. I lied about the flying part.

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Why was Billy no mates? He had no friends.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops