What's black, white, and red all over? Numerous different objects because many different things can posses a variety of colors, including the ones listed above.

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HOw do u DEFeat thE hatErsz shitted on em

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A Blond and a Brunette are falling down to their deaths, which one hits the ground first? Does it matter? They both die anyway.

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Two chavs jump off a cliff, who wins? Neither. Leaving aside the fact that two people would jump off a cliff in any kind of competitive context is highly improbable, due to the laws of physics objects fall at the same speed and therefore both people would hit the ground at the same time, meaning that, unless either of them deployed a parachute mid way through, they would, in fact, be in a dead heat.

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Diarrhea

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An asian and white guy walk into a bar, the white man says to the asian "Do I know you from somewhere?" The asian says. "Yes, I used to go to college with you." The white man remebers him, and they catch up on life.

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Why did the man kill the hamster? To get to the other side.

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Do cows get breast cancer or utter cancer?

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw 'em.

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Did you hear about that superman guy? He died.

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Roses are red, lemons are sour, open your legs and give me an hour.

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Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black I'm blind

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So a woman walks out of a kitchen, she is instantly mauled by a bear.

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what looks like a bug, lives in larch mount and lives in a mansion? Aodhan Hearty, lied about the mansion... he lives in a web with his buggy family

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What's white, wet, and salty? Salt that has come in contact with a liquid in the recent past, seeing as the liquid has not evaporated completely from the combination of sodium and chloride yet.

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Why do midgets laugh when they run? Because the grass tickles their balls.

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Whats green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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Refridgerator.

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How do you stop a baby from crying? Slit its throat

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What do you get when you cross a lamb and a pigeon? You get your house taken away.

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What's long, hard, and in my pants? The SAT's... I lied about it being in my pants.

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What did the Jews say before they got of the bus? Let's make like a Jewish kid's forskin and get the hell out of here.

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A horse walks into a bar. A chicken crosses the road. Humanity is no more. Nature reclaims the Earth.

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Why did Doris need a hip replacement Because she fell down the stairs

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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