What do you do when a blonde throws a grenade at you? Pull the pin and throw it back at her

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One man calls emergency: - Come immediately, my little son has swallowed a condom! After five minutes, the same man calls back: - It is OK, I found another one.

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What do you call a zebra with no stripes? A zebra with no stripes

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What do you call a white guy in a mostly black neighborhood? His name.

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Question:Why did little Susie fall off the swing? Answer:Because she had no arms or legs. Question:What did little Susie get for Christmas? Answer: a bike, and cancer Question: what did little Susie get next Christmas? Answer: nothing, she didn't live that long... Knock knock Who's there Not little Susie

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Three examples of how santa is gay 1) he says HO HO HO 2) he sneaks into your house at night from going down the chimney 3) he knows when u r sleeping and he knows when u r awake BONUS............. Better not pout, you better not cry, better watch out im telling u why.........SANTA CLAUS IS COMING TO TOWN

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chicken brains are not as large or developed as human brains, therefore preventing the chicken from making a logical decision, leading to it crossing a road with heavy traffic and eventually being run over by a semi.

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Q: How do you do to get an elephant down from a tree? A: Wait for the fall when the leaves start falling you shoot it down.

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What is the difference between Acenaphthoquinone and Acetoguanamine? I don't know...

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Theaters say silence is golden... Trap silence in a jar, make millions.

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How do you get a blond out of tree? Shoot her in the head.

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Your mamas so old that she sat next to Jesus in kindergarten?

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why did the chicken cross the road? there was a black man walking towards him

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Q. What is worse than a worm in your apple? A. Hitler

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what happens when you throw a green rock into a yellow pond. it makes a spash.

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Your momma's so fat: She regrets not making the most of her youth whilst she was still attractive.

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I am thinking of a number between 1 and 100 what is it There are many numbers between 1 and 100 so it is highly unlikely that I will guess the right number

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What's the difference between Jam and Jelly? You can't Jelly your dick into your girlfriend's ass.

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Whats the difference between males and females? fe

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Where did Mary go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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An Anthony eats a juicy pickle.

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Why did Dom move to Wales? Because he is poor!

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What did the soldier get for his birthday? Shot in the face.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops