roses are red violets are blue i take pleasure in the simple things in life as i have nothing else left to live for

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how many friends does tomas have 0 he is a loner

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roses are blue violets are red dont judge me

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How do you like them apples I dont like aplles

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An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman are on a plane. The plan is carrying too much weight, and is destined to crash. They drop the luggage, but there is still too much weight on board. They drop the secondary engine, but there is still too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

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What's worse than dropping your loli-pop? The Holocaust

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What did one ocean say to the other? Nothing, oceans don't have hands to wave either

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whats funnier than throwing a baby off a cliff cathcing him at the bottom with a pitch fork

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Why was the dyslexic cowboy crying when he came into school that day? He had chronic diarrhea.

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Pretend you are in a box and there is no way out. How do you get out? You don't

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What's purple and has four legs? I don't know. What? I DONT KNOW EITHER THAT'S WHY I'M ASKING YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the sidewalk he was on does not.

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How do you make a blonde fall off of a cliff? You push her off of the cliff.

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Knock, Knock! Who`s there? Your mama`s stupid! Your mama`s stupid who? Your mama`s stupid as a rock! I` m going to cut your eyes out and use them as baseballs!

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven killed off his entire family.

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Come in! Come in who? I'm just com in' inside.

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What did George Washington say to his men before crossing the Delaware River? "Men, we're crossing the Delaware River."

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What's worse than being in the Holocaust? Dying in the Holocaust.

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What did Steven Hawking get for christmas? A bike.

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How does a cow does a cow do an evil laugh?

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why was little timmys mother so upset on mothers day? Because he had been abducted earlier that week

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"hey bro" "WHATS UP" "nothin..... I heard you had your first bj yesterday." "YEAH!!" "how'd it taste?" ........

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops