Part 1 Q: what did Sally get for Christmas A: cancer Part 2 knock knock Who's there Not Sally MR

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Wife: "I suggest you check properly next time you lose your keys so that you find them quicker" Husband: "I suggest that next time I sit down and have a beer while I wait for Doc Martin and his time machine to give my keys back.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

2 moose sitting in a tree, suddenly there came a boat and landed in the tree next to them, then said one of the moose, he probably lives there

thumb_up thumb_down +3

YO MAMA'S SO , A STUPID, THAT SHE PUT 2 QUARTERS IN HER EARS AND THOUGHT THAT SHE WAS LISTENING TO FIFTY-CENT!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did batman say to robin before they got in the car Get in the car

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A man walks into a bar. His crippling alcoholism is tearing his family apart.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Roses are red, violets are blue I've got Alzheimer's cheese on toast

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

telll someone to ask u if u are a tree then say nooooooo

thumb_up thumb_down +3

why does pink turn into blue it doesnt you just get hit by a frigde because you cried whe you got shot several times

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q: What did the nazi say to hitler? A: You like my Auschwitz?

thumb_up thumb_down +3

CJTheBEST Sticks and stones, May break my bones, Because i have osteoperosis

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q:whats the difference between grass and a car? A:They all have wheels, except the grass

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why were accents created? So when people go to Texas they come back sounding like a D-Bag.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the Asian man say to the taxi driver? Diarrrhea

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

what is another way to say tree? A big stick with leaves

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do a reindeer and a grape have in common? They are both purple, except for the reindeer.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How do you call a black person in KFC? By a Phone.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A black man, a white man and a Mexican walk into a bar. They have a beer, enjoy some pleasant conversation, then go home to their families.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the man say to the cat? Nothing it had his tongue

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why can't Stuart post a joke? Because he is using a giant iphone

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why was the boy so tired? He had to carry his moms dead body up the stairs.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A baby seal walks into a club. :|

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops