A pope meets another one

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why did u put your iphone in the blender?!?!? because i wanted to make apple juice..

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How much does a polar bear weigh? about 900 pounds

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why did the alien eat the cow? peer pressure

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Q. What do you get when you mix eggs, mashed potatoes and salt? A. A pretty good batter for mashed potato pancakes.

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what is worse than a guy pissed?

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what do you get when you cross a broken arm and a broken leg? a broken head.

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ROMEO ROMEO WHEREFORE ART THOU ROMEO

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a white guy walks into a bar luckily he is not an alcoholic and knows when to safely stop drinking and already gave his keys to a friend.

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A man walks into a bar. His family has died in a tragic accident and he is trying to drink down the pain.

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What do u do if a blonde throws a bomb at u Trigger the bomb and throw it back

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George W. Bush

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What do you call the man with no arms or legs, swimming in the bay? Bob.

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Is it a bird, Is it a plane, I don't know what it is but it's heading straight for the World Trade Centre

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Why was Mr. Smith always so sad at the block party? His uncle molested him as a child, when he was 10 he finally told his mother. His mother and father later fought if they should tell the police, the mother wanted him to go to jail, and the dad didn't want to ruin his family because the uncle was his brother, and the uncle had children. Right before his mother would call the police his father stabbed her in the back, mr smith saw what happened. Him and his father hid his mothers body and mr smith"s dad told him if he tells anyone about this he will kill him. Years later when mr smith was 13 he went on drugs to ease the pain, he later became an addict, and dropped out of school. He know suffers from depression and has killed all 3 of his wives. He is wanted in many middle eastern countries. So when ever he goes to sleep he has the same dream were him mom offers him pot and right before he gets it his dad stabs her in the back. So know mr smith is sad at the block party because he will kill himself later tonight.

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A blonde is locked in a super-market. She dies.

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You no what the biggest lie in history is? Agreeing to the terms and services whenever you sign up for a website

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

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Why did the bear fall down? I shot it. Why did the second bear fall down? It tripped over the first one.

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An Octopus walked into a bar. He then died as he had been out of his natural habitat for an exceedingly long period of time. An octopus can only survive on land for 30 minutes.

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what do black and white people have in common? when they dont wear sunscreen, they get sunburnt, except for black people.

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If you say "Hi" to every tree you pass, is that being environmentally friendly?

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My dad weights 350 lbs. He decided to switch to diet soda.

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Why do aliens listen to relaxing music while they have sex? They like to cum in peace. \m/

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops