Dylan Hodge's mother touches her own butthole at night. Joshua Brown's sister rubs Josh's earlobes passionately. Brock is a fag. Jacob is Awesome. Daniel THINKS he's awesome. Jamie kills everyone. Apart from Jacob.

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Who let the dogs out? The dog's owner.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, My name's Dave, Microwave!

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Yo momma so stupid she threw a rock at the ground And missed.

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What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

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Q: Why did the black man die poor? A: Because he was financially irresponsible and wasted the millions left to him by his father fueling his alcohol addiction, slowly grinding away at his organs until he died of cirrhosis of the liver.

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Wanna hear the most repeated joke on anti jokes? Why did [insert name here] fall off the swing? Because he/she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not [insert name here].

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Dont joke about the holocaust. My grandfather died there, he fell off the guard tower.

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What do you call a guy with an axe in his head? Chuck

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How do you fit 500 babies into a phone booth? With a blender. How do you get them out? Nachos (make a dipping and snacking motion).

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how many people were on the bus........ 0 cause the bus was parked for 45 years

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How many electricians does it take to change a lightbulb? No seriously, I don't know because we've only just got electricity in our village.

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What did the man on the moon say? ...Im on the moon.

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A women answers the phone. -"Hello?" -"Yes, hi, have I reached the Smiths?" -"No, you've reached the wrong number" The two women hand up, and continue with their lives.

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if john has 400 cookies and eats 300 what does he have left? diabetes

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Why did the fish look like a human? Because it was a person, drowning.

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Spot the mistake: a) x+2= 5 => x=3. b You.

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When you see birds flying in a V why is one side of the V always longer than the other? There are more birds on that side

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What had 82 eyes, 7 mouths, and sings the blues? Nothing, the described creature does not exist.

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In the movie Sherlock holms, why is Sherlock Holms gay?? --------------Because he is chasing "blackwood"

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why was the boy sad? his bellybutton hurt

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what's the difference between an abortion clinic and my basement? there are more dead fetuses in my basement

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how do you kill a black guy ? AIDS

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What's long and blackand goes all night? night time

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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