why did the homeless man die? because everyone does.

How did the girl cross the road? -She didn't, she died because she was blind and didn't see the "don't walk" sign.

What do you call it when a dead man has his wallet stolen? Rob Zombie.

How do you make a tree angry Overall trees have no sense of emotion therefore it is impossible to anger a tree.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I have ADD Check out this flashlight!

Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

What's brown and smells of chocolate? Chocolate or something dipped in chocolate but that might also smell of something else - like bananas.

Q.What do you call a man with no arms, no legs, no head, and no blood in his body? A.Dead.

A blonde, a brunette, and a red head walk into a bar. You think they should have ducked?

did you hear about the little girl who won first place in her school's spelling bee? she was hit by a bus

What happened to the boy who ate a piece of his Halloween candy? He died. It was laced with cyanide.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have ADD Hey look, a squirrel!!

Why did the bus driver tell the black man to get to the back of the bus? Because all the seats up front were full and its dangerous to stand in a moving vehicle

Two penguins in a bath tub, one says "Pass me the soap" and the other one says "What do you think I am, a radio!"

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor.

Knock Knock Who's there? Just open the damn door.

What did the widow get for mother's day? A miscarriage

Whats worse than one dead Baby in ten trash cans Getting raped by kobe

Hurricane sandy should have been named hurricane snooki because it ruined the jersey shore

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was curious about something that had diverted his attention.

What's worse than one cat stuck in a tree? Getting raped

What long black and tasty? Licorice

I'm so hungry I could eat a horse and chase the jockey.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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