Roses are red, violets are blue When I cut you, you bleed

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4 score and 7 years ago was 1965

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Why did the woman stop jogging? She got mauled by a bear.

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Q how do you feel? A with a series of nerve endings, that send signals to my brain

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A midget goes up to a prostitute and asks "what’s the worst joke you ever heard?" She replies "probably this one

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When a mommy and a daddy love each other very much... and after being married for 39 years... They get divorced

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what is the name of the book that helen keller wrote LADIUFgSLDGFhalkjgfvcgh

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Why did Samuel drive his car into a tree? Because the tree was being a total jerk, blocking the road.

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In Soviet Russia, you wouldn't have a likely chance of surviving because of Stalin's mass paranoia and total neglect for his fellow man.

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Yo mama so fat she left the house in high heels and when she came back she had on flip flops. tom halls mum

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What is green, walks on four legs, and is capable of the strongest bite in the world? An alligator.

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Two guys walk into a bar. But the third one was a duck.

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Q: What's red and bad for your teeth? A: Bricks.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, roses are red, violets are blue, roses are red, I have amnesia.

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What did Susie do when the music was too loud Nothing

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Q:Why don't black people go on cruises? A:They already fell for that trick once.

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If i was gay... I would have strong sexual feelings towards peolple of the same sex as me

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Why did the man walk up to a bank teller with a gun? He is the security guard; he wanted to ask her for financial advice.

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what did the murderer say when he lost his gun? dangit. now i cant kill anyone

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What is the difference between a Nigga and a bucket of shit? ....The bucket.

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Why cant the guy drink his beer Because he hasnt opened it yet

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Vaginal secretions

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Three Jewish men walk into a butcher. They dont buy any pork products and thank the butcher for his services.

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Keira Knightley walked in to a coffee shop. The man behind the counter said "Wow, you're Keira Knightley!". Keira replied, "No, actually I am just one of your many masturbatory fantasies. You are currently staring at an old lady that just asked you for a latte". "Oh, by the way. You are drooling and have an erection."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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