how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? Not enough

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Tic tac toe. I never met my father

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knock knock who's there? the man the man who? the man who murdered your whole family

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Roses are blue Violets are red I shot your valentine Straight in the head

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It's raining, its pouring, the old man is snoring. He bumps his head, and is quickly rushed to the ER for serious head trauma

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Friends are like snowflakes When you pee on them they disappear

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A horse walks into a bar and begins to moo. Everyone is confused until it takes off its costume and reveals it's just a cow.

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You: Why did hitler go to hell? Them: Why? You: You're an idiot.

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A horse walked into a bar. The bartender asked, "Why the long face?" The horse said nothing because it doesn't understand human language.

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A Brunette, a Redhead and a Blond all jump off a cliff, which one will hit the ground last? Since the acceleration of gravity is 9.8 m/s they will all hit the ground simultaneously and with enough force to completly shatter their bodys making body recovery extreemly difficult. They must have had a hard life.

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Why did Susie fall out the swing, Because I hate disabled people and i pushed her

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can't you hear that TOOT Ta TOOT TOOT, TOOT Ta TOOT TOOT flute (nicki minaj in a past life listening to a symphony)

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Why did Little Billy trip? Because I shot his foot off.

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Why did the maid clean the house? Because that's her job, ya moron.

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why did the skeleton cross the road ? because it wanted too. lolz

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Why did the black man walk into a bar? To order a drink.

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what do JFK, plato, and a dead penguin have in common? theyre all dead.

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How do chinese people call the firemen? By phone.

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A man loses his wife in a car accident He then fall into a deep depression then hangs himself.

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Knock knock. *Silence Knock knock *silence Knock knock *Silence KNOCK KNOCK. *Silence (Busts open door) Oh right I murdered Billy a week ago

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- Why did the man with the big pocket get arrested in Utah? - Because adultery is illegal in Utah.

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How do you make a anti-joke on this website? Type it out, click I have read and agree to the Terms of Service, then press submit.

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Ask me if I am a Truck Are You a Truck No

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What do you say to a man with no legs at a bus stop.. How you getting on.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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