Why did the smoker die at a petrol station? He had lung cancer.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Sorry wrong door.

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Wait, I am sleepy as the world which spawned you Nero, but which comment is mine again?

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What did batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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An Irishman, Englishman and Scotsman come across a magic slide. They each decide to take a turn. The Irishman goes first, sliding down and shouting "GOLD!", and finding himself in a pile of gold as he reaches the bottom. The Englishman slides down screaming "SILVER!", and lands in a heap of silver at the bottom. The Scotsman takes his turn, and shouts "WEEEE!" as he slides down. He gets up and realises what a needless waste of a wish his enjoyment cost him.

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What's worse than being eaten by a giant bear? Hitler.

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Q. Whats blue and looks like a bucket? A. a blue bucket Q. whats green and looks like a bucket? A. a blue bucket in disguise.

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You know whats worse than an anti-joke? Practically Anything.

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Remember that comic blooper? Captain America fighting some dude: Okay buster only one of us is getting out of here alive! Next panel: Captain is kicking his foe and yelling AND IT WONT BE MEEEEEEEE! ...

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Q: How do you make Osama Bin Ladin happy? A: Take him out to a nice seafood dinner free of charge.

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The good part of "Age" of Ultron? THANOS REIGNS! Disagree? Just leave the green thumb and fuck off!

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A german police officer sees a Rabbi. Nothing happens, it's 2011

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Knock Knock Who's there? Your physician, you're going to die.

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Why do black people have a bad reputation? Because they do bad things.

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why did the boy fly away because his mum shot him out of a cannon

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for his birthday? A bike

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Why did Jimmy get off of the park bench? he wanted candy from the man in the white van

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"Sticks and stones" the man said and shat on three different complex turtles

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Why did the man slowly cross the road? He had a prosthetic leg.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Grass is red, HOLY SHIT THE GARDEN'S ON FIRE

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Why did the girl drop her cookie? She had no arms.

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- Women have rights, aren't they? - Yes, they have.

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Why was the fat girl a virgin? Good morals

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A pirate walks into a doctors office with ship's wheel attached to his crotch. Pirate: "Arrrrrr, do ya accept Kaiser Permanente?" Doctor: "Yes, but there's a $20 co-pay."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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