why did the bus hit the kid? he dropped his ice cream.

Andi: I have a great knock-knock joke, but you need to start it. Jake: Okay...Knock-knock! Andi: Who's there? Jake: ...

What's a Hillbilly's last words? I won't be here much longer, so take care of the kids. I love you.

why did the pyromaniac burn down the house? because he is a pyronaniac, he derives pleasure from burning things.

Why didn't Clemson accept John Burns' college application? Because John Burns was wanted for five counts of first degree murder.

True or fales? Eddie Izzard.

Why Jimmy doesn't listen to his mother? Because he's deaf

why did katy fall off her bike?

What did Kermit the frog say at Jim Henson's funeral? Nothing.

An anteatter walks into a bar, the bar tender says "hey renee zellweger"

i like your face... HAHAHAHAH just kidding you make me want to projectile vomit.

What did one orphan say to the other? 'Robin get in the car!'

In a galaxy far, far, away.... There were quasars, stars, and various sized meteors.

Does 2 + 2 = fish? No.

Your mother is so fat, she is dying due to obesity and it would be utterly disgusting to make fun of anyone in that situation.

Sarah lost both arms in a car accident Knock knock Who's there? Not sarah. Roses are red Violets are blue Wow. Clever Knock knock Who's there? Still not Sarah, as she is in a serious condition at her local hospital, and so is fighting for her life.

The awkward moment when something of quite awkwardness occurs.

When geese fly south, why is one side of the V usually longer than the other? There are more geese on that side.

What do a duck and a bicycle have in common? They both have handlebars, except for the duck!

what did the boy with no arms and legs get for chrismas ? cancer

You wanna know what's totally out of this world? The moon

Q: Why did the clown fall off the swing? A: Because he was shot in the face

Why did the chicken croos the road? He was battling severe depression at the time. His alcoholism was tearing his family apart, he was declining in job performance and his boss threatened to fire him several times. I guess at that point he just decided to end it all. It was horribly tragic, policemen knocking on the door of his wife's chicken roost and informing her of the bad news. As soon as she heard, she rushed to the scene, only to see his mangled body spread across the street, intestines falling out. They held a closed casket funeral. Formal, all black. It was raining by the time the casket was brought to the cemetery to be buried. She hasn't stopped crying since. His children ask her, where's dad, but all she can do is weep. Suicide is bad, kids

why was the little boy sad? because he had a frog stapled to his face.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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