why did jenny fall off the swing? because she had no arms Knock Knock Whos there? not jenny

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What did the dog say to the cat? Nothing, his mouth was full of it's intestines.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What did the boy say to his father? I don't know. With the seemingly infinite number of topics that two people could discuss and the fact that both the father and son are fictional, it would be unreasonable and border edge mentally unstable for me to assume that you would know what they may or may not be talking about.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Throughout her entire pregnancy Sheniqua smoked, drank, and did many narcotic drugs such as heroin and cocaine. Why did she lose her baby before coming to term? Because I strangled her to death for being black.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What did the girl say when she got her period? Nothing, why would she want anyone to know?

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Jesse is so fat, his weight on his scale says " hahaha gotta love childhood obesity"

thumb_up thumb_down -27

This is not an anti-joke... A man is walking down a street and see's a small boy crying in an alley. The man walks up to him and asks him "What's wrong little guy?" The boy replies that his family is poor, they just got evicted from there house and his parents decided to kill themselves. The man decides out of guilt to bring the boy home and support him for a few days. Three days later the man see's a note on the couch that says "Thank You..." Signed Jamal. The man sighs and says to himself "Your Welcome." The man walks into his room and see's the boy's body in his closet. He starts hysterically laughing and cries into his pillow for many minutes. When he is done sobbing he asks himself "What could be worst than this?" The man walks to his kitchen asking that question over and over. He reaches into his cabinet and grabs his cereal and pours into his bowl. The boy walks out chuckling and says, "Bye bye..." The man was poisoned and died. Now the boy get's the other cereal out and is about to pour it only to find out it was empty. "Screw the Holocaust this SUCKS!!!!!"

thumb_up thumb_down -27

A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 30 years later he would gamble away his family's life savings and then go onto live a long and unfulfilled life.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why did the chicken cross the road? Solely for our entertainment purposes.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

So I was sitting in traffic the other day... And I got run over.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Q: what did batman say to robin before they got into the car? A: get in the car (:

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Check out our iPhone App!

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why cant Joe drive his tractor? Because he doesn't have any arms or legs. Why doesn't Joe have any arms or legs? BECAUSE JOE IS A POTATO.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What did Siri say to Cortana? Nothing. Someone has to say something in order to activate either one of the voice recognition devices.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What's up? Not the Twin Towers.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What can fly, but can not swim? Malaysia Airlines Flight 370

thumb_up thumb_down -27

whats worse than finding half a worm in your apple? being wrongly accussed of a crime you didnt commit because of your race, and being put on death row

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What happened after the man with no arms and legs lost his keys? He called the police.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What do you get when you cross isopropil alcohol,ammonia; dish detergent fluid, water, vinegar, and lemon oil? Window Cleaner.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Wanna hear a joke about a baby with AIDS? It never gets old.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Soooo... a black man walked into a bar and asked the bartender for a beer.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

There once was a man from Peru, he couldn't fit into his shoe. He went to Brazil bought a big. Swallowed it and died.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Nig gers Jews Bean ers and fa ggots and everyones grandma that died recently, F u c k you there all burning in Hell.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops