Why did the boy get stuck on the toilet? He was Elvis.

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Q: What's worse than eating cauliflowers? A: Eating cauliflowers and getting raped by Jerry Sandusky at the age of 7.

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Why did the white man go to jail? He broke the law.

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Where is one place everyone eventually goes to rest? A cemetery.

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Mel Gibson and a Jew walk into a bar They proceed to have a pleasant conversation and both take taxis home

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Yo momma so fat when god said let there be light he said get the fuck out the way!

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"Want to hear something ironic?" ...he said to the deaf man.

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Do you know what my favorite rhetorical question is?

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a duck walks up to a lemonade stand. thats impossible, because nature says that ducks cannot walk.

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Why is a budgie Because the other leg is yellow

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A black man, a mexican, and a muslim all jump off a building. Who hit the ground first? Who cares!

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have down syndrome duh dusfy druah

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf a bread

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ARE YOU READY?! ARE YOU READY FOR LOVE!? YES I AM, AH! ARE YOU READY?! ARE YOU READY FOR LOVE?! The judge did not find the Elton John song worthy of negating the statuary rape charges and sentenced him to nine years in jail.

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Q: What do Magic Johnson and Freddie Mercury have in common? A: Freddie Mercury is dead.

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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I used to be an adventurer like you, Then I settled down in a quiet place in the woods with a girl and raised a family.

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What do you call somebody pimping out their bitches for very large amounts of money???? A dog breeder.

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did you know, that a Bear has 42 teeth? massive erection.

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Im cute hehehee

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What did Batman's mother say when it was time for dinner? Nothing, Batman's parents are dead.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Get in the van.

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A farmer was robbed and complained to the sheriff's department that he suspected it was a black man behind the crime. "How do you know this for sure?" The sheriff asked him. He replied, "I chased him into the night, it was dark and I couldn't see him"

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What did the onion say to the the the other other onion Ima cut you fool and make yall cry

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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