When did the laughter finally die? When you started this joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's the difference between 10,000 dead babies and a Farari? I don't have a Farari in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Knock Knock. Who's there? Mark Mark who? Mark Jennings. Oh hey, Mark, come in.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's green has eight legs, and would kill you of it fell on you from the top of a tree? A Billiard table

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did th chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock! Who's there? The chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the boy eat for breakfast? Food

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A theif walks into a blonde ladies apartment. The theif takes all of her valuable belongings, leaving her life in shambles.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

What happened after September 11, 2001? September 12, 2001

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What happens when you stick your finger in a pencil sharpener? Blood everywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A young couple just gave birth to their first child and the doctor says, I’ve good some good news and some bad news, what do you want first? Give us the bad news first, the parents reply. Your baby has red hair, says the doctor. Well whats the good news, ask the parents. It’s dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

You know what really chaps my ass? Thongs.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

I forgot what i was gonna say

thumb_up thumb_down -2

If you driving a jetski and the wheeles fall off how many screws does it take to fix the dog house? BLUE PAINT

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why was 6 afraid of 7? He wasn't: 9 was a dick.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Ever had sex while camping? It's great.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Whats big and white and will kill you if it falls from a tree? A Fridge.

thumb_up thumb_down +1,206

Why can't Michael Jackson swim? Because he is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Q:Where did sally go when the bomb went off? A: Everywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call a fish with no eyes? Extremely vulnerable to predacious animals such as Brown Bears and Grey Herons

thumb_up thumb_down -17

My kids are mistakes.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q: What do you call a hillbilly with 12 girl friends? A: A shepherd.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Your girlfriend.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's worse than a worm in your apple That one time I rapped and killed your mom, oh and happy birthday prick

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops