how do you kill a blonde? shoot her in the face with a pistol

Your mom is so ugly that she was mercilessly bullied throughout high school which led to severe depression and low self-esteem, however she went to college, got a career, found a man who loved her for who she is, not how she looks, and raised a family happily ever after.

Why did the 60 y/o man take erectile dysfunction pills? His doctor prescribed them.

Why was the black man eating fried chicken? He was on death row and it was his last meal request..

c:

What ryhmes with turtle rape

Why was the crocodile depressed? It wasn't; given the primitive anatomy of the reptilian brain, modern biopsychoneurological evidence suggests that reptiles feel only basic emotions such as fear or anger.

Why did Santa go to a rap concert? Because Santa was a rapper

Q: What's worse than finding 1 worm in your apple? A: Finding 2 worms in your apple Q: What's worse than finding 2 worms in your apple? A: The Holocaust Q: What's worse than the Holocaust? A: Finding 3 worms in your apple!

why did the girl scream when she got her tooth pulled? Because it hurt her.

A paralysed man falls over.

What do you call a puppy that has been left in the cold? A puppsicle

Q: What do you get when you cross Rebecca Black and a day of the week. A: a stupid song called FRIDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I LIKE TRAINS

What's the difference between a black man and and a bag of crap? A lot, but mostly the bag

Friend: Hey dude, you wanna come to my house after school and do some Meth? Other Friend: Nah I dont wanna get scabs all over my skin, disgusting teeth, and im not in the mood for dying early. Im good here.

what do trees like to drink? r o o t b e a r

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a pressure-sensitive explosive device.

How was the copper wire invented? 2 Jews pulling on the same penny!

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

What's Red and Invisible? No Tomatos

What group of people do the police target? Criminals.

What's funnier than a joke book? 2 joke books.

Stevie Wonder: Did you see the new piano I got from pepsi? Me: no.... Stevie Wonder: Neither did I...........

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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